The Ukraine Train

The ride is over----

2008-08-02T22:28:00.000-07:00

I have waited to post this last blog---- it is bittersweet for me. I had to take a poll to help confirm that I should indeed end this blog and merge it with my Smilesandtrials blog. While I have loved journaling all about our adoption journey to Ukraine, Dennis is now home, is a huge part of our family and therefore should be on our family blog. I will update you with this final post to share the huge strides Dennis has made since he has been home.

Thank you to all of you who have let the most encouraging and thoughtful comments. I appreciate them so much. Thank you to all that have contributed to our family in some way. What a huge blessing you have been to our family. I can't even begin to express how uplifting you have all been. God Bless you.

Just tonight John took this picture of Anna, Dennis, and I. I love it! He laid in my arms for an hour after this picture till he finally fell asleep. Did I mention that he is a sweaty little boy when he sleeps? :)

A couple of days ago, Dennis got this soft, homemade blanket and talking doggy. Thanks Jody for sending such a wonderful gift!

If Dennis could talk this is what he would be saying---"Oh no! My Mama caught me playing with her vacuum cleaner. Better pretend that I was playing with this piano instead."

Dennis is gaining weight! Since he was weighed during his medical exam in Ukraine he has gained four pounds---- in only 16 days!

Here is Dennis getting ready for his bath on 7/19/08.

Look at him on 8/1/08! He has filled out so much--- very little of his ribs show---- there is actual chunkiness forming around his thighs! He feels so much nicer in my arms--- not as fragile and not as bony!

I am just thrilled that he has taken off like he has since he came home.

Here are five huge noticeable changes that have taken place with our son Dennis.

1. He walks without help whereas when we first met him he had an awkward crawl and couldn't walk without our help.
2. He coos, laughs, and jabbers up a storm. During the first week we heard very little sound from Dennis.
3. He is an eating machine now that he is home! The first time I tried to feed him a banana, he gagged and spit it out, and I was concerned that he might have eating issues.
4. Dennis is into everything if we let him ------ the cupboards, the movies, the puzzles, even the toilet! Awwwe!! That caught me off guard! Now all of us are closing the toilet seat and bathroom door for added precaution.
5. Dennis is not shy around his siblings after all! In fact, Dennis loves all of them so much as they do him--- it is so obvious to everyone!

I have to admit that the first morning home, Dennis fell off the bed because I dozed off with him supposedly sleeping next to me. I felt like such a horrible mother for him falling off that I decided to show him how to get off by turning himself around and scooting off the side slowly until his feet hit the ground. Kid you not, I only had to show this kid once and now he is always scooting himself off the bed, that little turkey! I'm now rethinking what I have taught him. :)

He has his first consult with the pediatric plastic surgeon up at Valley Children's Hospital this Tuesday, August 5th. I have also talked with UCLA and Shriner's but feel at this time that going with this particular doctor is the best choice for Dennis and our family. Not only does this doctor come highly recommended but the hospital is fairly close by which means minimal travel and this doctor has already written two letters on our behalf to include as part of our dossier when we did all of our adoption paperwork.

Now please come join us over at our family blog where I will continue to share all about Dennis and how he is doing. And if you have any questions, please feel free to ask whenever.

Dennis is Walking!

2008-07-30T20:36:00.000-07:00

It really amazes me how much Dennis has progressed developmentally, physically, and emotionally since he has come home just 11 short days ago. Honestly, I expected him to take longer to catch up, and I was hoping that I would get to have a baby for at least a little while longer---- but alas that is not the case at all. I have a full fledged toddler!

Dennis is Home Video

2008-07-28T23:20:00.000-07:00

Now that Dennis is home, I thought it would be nice to make a video of him with all of us. He is so much a part of our family. Hope you enjoy!

This is Home music by Switchfoot

Dennis home a week

2008-07-27T15:41:00.000-07:00

Have I told you how many times I have counted my blessings since Dennis has come home one week ago? I can't begin to tell you to make you truly understand what a blessing he has been to our family. So often I hear how lucky he is that we took him in, but oh how wrong are those that only consider our son the lucky one. It is indeed our family that has through him once again been shown that God makes no mistakes. Dennis is no mistake, and how much my kid's adore him help me to know that they feel that no one ever needs to be perfect in order for them to be wanted. Dennis is so wanted. Just take any of my children aside and ask them........... Dennis is one cool baby!

Just had to get that off my chest. :)

Here are some of my favorite pictures taken from last week.

Here is Dennis getting his first haircut. He was such a good boy while I trimmed it up. He has a couple of bald spots caused by scarring...... so that was a bit of a challenge cutting it evenly yet being sure his hair still covers them so that he has a natural looking head of hair. I think I did a pretty good job considering this was my first attempt.

He loves to brush his teeth. Doing this kept him occupied while getting his teeth clean too! What a good mom I am..... teaching my son to multi-task so young. :)

This is Jonny's first time being a big brother. He really enjoys it especially since Dennis is so much fun to play with!

Can't you see how proud Jonny is?!!!!

Dennis enjoys when I rub baby lotion on his legs and feet. I asked Jonny if I could rub some on
him after I was done with Dennis. After convincing Jonny that he wouldn't be considered a baby just because I rubbed baby lotion on him, he let me.

Here I thought that Dennis would have major eating issues, and in my opinion, he has none unless you consider needing to have his food pureed a problem. But I don't, and he eats everything and tons of it. I made around three gallons of borscht with tons of fresh veggies and froze it in bags. Come time I need it, I thaw a bag out and then puree it into a thick soup, heat it up, add a piece of crumbled up bread and two heaping tablespoons of sour cream with a pat of butter, and voila......... delicious and nutritious baby food that even I would eat!

Dennis looks like a sleeping angel, doesn't he?

Little by little, Dennis is making more direct eye contact with me, and I'm cherishing it!

Mommy-Baby Bonding

2008-07-25T14:46:00.000-07:00

There is no doubt in my mind that our adopted children have had rough starts in life meaning that at some point in their life they go through many losses before they eventually make it to our arms. It can bring incredible sadness if you take the time to stop and think about it or you can channel that energy in a productive and loving way that will help to bring you and your child closer together because you have bonded and finally given them a foundation to build their relationship with you on. I wrote on this very topic almost a year ago, and my sentiments remain the same. I encourage you to read my other post before proceeding with this post just so that you can truly understand my heart on the subject of bonding with your adopted child.

Dennis immediately bonded with John. I think it has much to do with John being a fun, loving guy who all kids like to be around...... especially the ones that are near and dear to his heart like his children. The fact that John is the first male figure in his life that appears strong, protective, yet nurturing may play another part. And don't forget that it was John who took Dennis from the orphanage and spent those first few days with him. At that point, John was his whole world.

I also think that because Dennis has had so many women caretakers in his life, it is hard to discern that I am anyone different. This lack of initial bonding with Dennis on his part doesn't bother me in the least because I recognize it for what it is, and I am grateful that Dennis' face lights up when John is in the room...... proving that Dennis can easily bond with someone. It just simply means that I have to show him that my love for him is safe, nurturing, always providing and something that he can count on no matter what.

How does a parent do that, one may ask? I for one believe that physical touch plays a HUGE role. Not only holding and rocking your child....... I am talking about nurturing through pats on the back, foot massages, stroking your child's head, and rubbing their belly. And taking baths with your child. This shouldn't come across as anything but what it actually is----- a mom and her young child bathing together so that her baby could lay on her stomach and have some skin on skin contact just like they would have had together had this child been born from her. With each of my biological kids, the doctor or midwife immediately set my naked child on my stomach so that we could have instant skin on skin contact and start the mother-child bond. The feelings of immeasurable love for my child filled me up.... I was addicted. I'm sure that babies feel the same kind of love through the same kind of intimacy. Should Dennis have any less of a relationship with me just because he is adopted? I don't think so.

Dennis really loved me rubbing his back as he splashed in the water. He even trusted me enough to lean back on me and let the water surround his whole body. As I gently scrubbed his cradle cap and cleaned behind his ears, I knew that he was getting physical touch that he had never felt before. Children in orphanages rarely get baths, nor do they get this kind of one on one attention. Dennis ate it up and I trust that his bond to me is that much stronger.

*Warning*
I'm not sure why I decided to post this picture..... I feel very vulnerable to ridicule because of how it can be construed...... but nonetheless I felt that for those who truly can understand my heart, it is worth it if they can find it helpful with their own adopted child in any way. So please, if you find this picture to be disgusting, sexual, or inappropriate please refrain from leaving a comment.

The Coveted Baby Picture

2008-07-24T22:18:00.000-07:00

This handsome little baby is our son Dennis. I'm not sure how old he is in this picture, but I count it a huge blessing to be in possession of it.

Though he has been home just under a week, it feels so natural with him here that it seems so much longer. I can't believe how easy he is..... just fill up his belly and he's good to go. No really, it is much more than that, but I must say that he really is a good baby.

We were shown this picture at our SDA appointment. Yes, we had an easy appointment because we went there knowing who we wanted to adopt, but it caught me off guard to be presented with this picture of our little guy. A tear rolled down my cheek when I saw the photo, and I knew that I had to have it. They would only do so if we returned with a newer picture of him after the adoption...... you better believe that was a high priority for John before he left the country.

Anyway, I wanted to share this precious photo of our son with all of you because I thought you might enjoy it if even just a fraction of what I did.

A Mother and Her Son

2008-07-23T00:13:00.000-07:00

This picture says a thousand words.

LOVE~~LIFE~~FOREVER~~PRECIOUS~~TRUST~~INTENSE~~BREATH~~SON

I am in love with my son. In my eyes he is just perfect. The new life he has breathed into me is indescribable. The joy he has brought our family is a gift that I am enjoying every second. Getting to watch his every move is such a privilege. Everyday he is blossoming into this little boy who will always be changing.... for the better....... because of love.

I want him to feel the same love for me because I am his Mama. I want him to trust and feel secure enough to be happy and love just the way my other children do.

Every day I make sure to spend some time rocking him right around the time he is going to sleep. The first night I did this, he cried for 10 minutes before drifting off to sleep. Although his adjustment has been going incredibly well, he seems to prefer to self sooth himself by sucking his hand and rubbing his neck. He would rather do this by himself. While this is not a terrible thing, I personally feel that he should be able to be soothed by me. I want him to know that he no longer needs to solely rely on himself to be comforted.

I am his Mama and I want him to know what it feels like to be rocked, cuddled, hugged......... I want him to know physical touch in the way that would actually cause him to reach out for it himself.

I look forward to the day where he leans forward to rub noses with me and then steals a little kiss just because he can.

Tonight when I got him ready for bed there was hardly a whimper when I picked him up to rock him. While he preferred to look away from me as I rocked him the prior two nights, this time I decided to hold him facing me. I wanted him to see my eyes, feel my breath, hear my heartbeat, and feel my kisses and nose rubs all over his face.

So far so good. Houston, we have made contact.

Loving Life with Dennis

2008-07-21T21:38:00.000-07:00

I must say that I am in love with my new son more than I could have imagined. From the moment we knew of him back in March to now, he has been such a blessing to our family. Everyday he is surprising me, as are the rest of my children and I feel like a very blessed mother.

Each of Dennis' older siblings have finally got to spend some one on one time with their little brother. Not only has each of them accepted Dennis and labeled him the cutest baby in the world, but Dennis seems to approve of all of them. I am amazed at how quickly each of them have seen past his eye and into his sweet little soul. I can't count the times that I have heard one of my children say today how perfect Dennis is.

Andrew just loved letting Dennis touch him as he got to know him. Dennis quickly learned that if he threw blocks down, Andrew would quickly run to pick them up. This was very entertaining for Dennis.

I just love this picture of Andrew and Jonny lying on the floor watching Dennis.

Jonny is so happy that he is finally a big brother. After being around Dennis for a while, Jonny noticed Dennis babbling after waking up from his nap. Dennis babbled and babbled and it was quite loud. Jonny's response? "Mom, I didn't know that Dennis speaks Spanish?"

Dennis always has someone just waiting to hold and play with him. This time it was Julia.

How funny! The girls put the socks on Dennis that John got from first class on the plane ride home. But William was way more entertaining.

Look at all the girls around Dennis. I bet he is loving life!

I don't think that Dennis had ever had his teeth brushed before us. His poor little gums bled a lot the first time John brushed his teeth. Now we brush them at least twice a day and his gums bleed very little. He is such a smart little man. When he sees the brush he opens his mouth like a little bird.

Daddy took Dennis swimming. Boy, did he love it!

Thanks Mom for the baby floaty. It is perfect!

Dennis was all smiles. He just loves water!

Today I got Dennis in to see our primary care physician. They were able to move it up from Thursday, praise the Lord. That means he will get to Valley Children's all the sooner.

His visit went really well.

Here he is being a big boy in the waiting room.

Here is Dennis waiting to see the doctor.

Dennis was very good during the exam. I also found out that he is very healthy. His ears look very clear as did his nose and throat. His unspecified heart disease was unfounded (surprise, surprise), and he has already gained over a pound since his exam at the Embassy last week. He is shy just one once from 20 pounds and is 31 1/2 inches tall. His head circumference is 19 in and he is not as delayed as I thought he would be. Praise the Lord again!

He got four shots, two in each leg, and little Dennis let me comfort him afterwards. Rachel and Julia were impressed how quickly he stopped crying.

He has now been officially referred up to Valley Children's to have his cleft palate closed.

As we were driving back to Grandma's to pick up the rest of the kids, I took this picture. I think it is so sweet the way Dennis wanted to hold his sisters' hands.

Dennis loves his oldest brother Adam because he makes him laugh. What makes me love this picture so much is the way that Adam was getting Dennis to laugh and smile. I see so much of his Dad, my husband in him and I already know what an amazing father he is going to make one day.

I just had to share this picture (edited of course) of Dennis at his first bath here at home. BTW, he just loves bathes. Don't worry, I am trying my best to fatten him up, and I bet he will look completely different in a couple of weeks.

My Sleeping Angel

2008-07-19T21:45:00.000-07:00

Daddy was right about you my sweet silly boy. You do like to occasionally sleep with your eye open. Don't worry my child, just rest and trust that you can close that eye. I am glad that you chose to close it when I gently stroked your eyelid down. Now you can sleep in complete peace now that you are in loving hands.

This is what I did at nap time and he fell asleep tonight with his eye shut. I truly don't think he has a problem at all....... I think he was just waiting till he felt safe before he would shut his eye.

Doesn't he look peaceful? His little snore is very cute too.

If you are wondering why the sock is on his hand, I had to make my first big mommy decision about him. Remember how I told you that he sucks his hand? While it is incredibly cute, it is making his hand look very raw and painful. His whole hand is chapped and has cracks in the crease of his thumb and first finger. His nail on his index finger is also badly deteriorated and I think that it has a fungal infection. So today I started putting Neosporin on his hand and thought this sock might help him to stop sucking his hand. So far so good, but I do feel for the little guy who I know finds great comfort in this. I hope that I am making the right decision and that this doesn't traumatize him to much. On the flip side, we have given him a bottle, and while he cannot suck from it, he finds great comfort holding it and biting the nipple which then squirts the liquid in his mouth.

Home at last!

2008-07-19T12:21:00.000-07:00

They got home at 2:00 am. We were outside waiting to greet them.

Julia and Rachel were so excited they could hardly stand it.

He is even more perfect than I remember.

Everyone wanted to take a turn holding Dennis before we all went to bed.

For the most part, Dennis didn't mind.

I think he remembers me from before. At least I like to think so.

Dennis and Daddy have a bedtime ritual that include playing tug-o-war with their teeth. Don't worry, it wasn't rough. :) Dennis slept with us last night. I learned that he sucks his fist for comfort and loves to have his bottom patted as he is going to sleep.

We all slept from 3:00 am to 8:15 am. Pretty good start to getting on a California baby schedule in my opinion.

For breakfast Dennis ate a whole mashed banana with 1/2 cup of rice cereal. That wasn't
enough for this champion eater so I fixed him the same amount with pears instead. He ate every last bite, and his belly button popped out to let us know he was full.

All of the kids are getting along great. Dennis seems to enjoy all of the attention, and the kids just adore him.

As for me, I couldn't ask for a more amazing son.

BTW, he is sound asleep taking his afternoon nap, and I have been asked about a million times if he could be woken up by the kids. My response..... NYET!

BIG UPDATE!!!!!!!!!!!

2008-07-18T22:39:00.000-07:00

Awesome news! The pilot announced, "Ladies and Gentlemen, just wanted to let you know that we were conducting a test and that the plane's auto pilot computer landed the plane!" Now John and Dennis are in the car driving home! Praise God.

The drive is three hours folks, but don't worry, John is running on adrenaline--- I can hear in his voice how excited he is to be in the car driving. His spirits are high, and I am just so thankful that they are on the last stretch home. Dennis did really well this last flight...... slept most of the way.... Yeah!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Meanwhile, we are here steadily preparing for their arrival.

The kids made welcome home banners.

And they did it with such enthusiasm!

Didn't they do a great job?!!!!!!!!!!!!

And here I am nesting like crazy.........hey wait a minute, I thought I vacuumed two days ago.

Caleb on dish duty.......... this Mama needs the kitchen to sparkle for her new arrival. I wish I could truly understand the nesting concept because I have had it with each and every child, and yet I knew back when I had my first child they don't even notice.... LOL.

I've even hung his picture.

Can you tell how excited we all are for Daddy and Dennis to just hurry up and be here?

Prayers Needed

2008-07-18T15:44:00.000-07:00

First off, don't let this title alarm you........ John and Dennis are sitting in JFK waiting for their next flight........ Dennis is an official US citizen! But, Dennis is incredibly tired and he is running on empty, as is Daddy. Just talked to John on the phone and while he remains in good spirit, I could hear Dennis crying in the background (he is in a kangaroo pouch in Daddy's lap so I could hear his cry right into the phone). They only had one seat flying into New York and Dennis didn't want to sit anyways.......... John walked round and round with Dennis on the long flight.

Just to have more room for Dennis on this next flight John has upgraded to first class. He wonders what the people in first class are going to think with a little, grumpy, tired bear in their seating area when they probably chose to sit in first class to avoid such things in the first place. My, my, my. If your reading please say a prayer for Dennis and John for safe travels and that Dennis has a nice long needed nap or at least is able to rest peacefully for a while. If I heard right too, I think that Dennis is still running a fever here and there, so please pray for that too.

On their way home!!!!!!!!!!

2008-07-17T22:46:00.000-07:00

Just got off the phone with John. He and Dennis are at the airport waiting to board their plane. John is thrilled that Dennis had a major poopie diaper this morning............ he hopes that means that he won't have to change one on the plane. :) Don't know why I shared that with you...... just thought it was cute.

What a full day !

2008-07-17T18:55:00.000-07:00

It started with a breakfast followed by the typical mouth-cleaning chew toy (ok water bottle) that he was just chillin' with in his new shorts.

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But Inna didn't want him skinning his knees crawling around her apartment so he got to sport his new pant socks too!

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But we could only explore the apartment so long before getting stir crazy so he and I decided to take a short walk to Kiev's awesome botanical gardens. Inna is really blessed with her apartment's location. Here's the main entrance.

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I walked through the gates with Dennis in my "kangaroo" pouch and headed left, where we walked through beautiful rock gardens (with cool views) over to this cool bell tower.

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The bells were being restored and these grounds are actually a working Monastery.

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We went inside and enjoyed the reverent peace.

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This is just one example of hundreds of paintings on the walls and ceilings. I was reminded of the monastery Christine and I had seen in Moscow in 2005.

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Afterwards, we headed out in the opposite direction and saw many nice flower garden arrangements like this one.

The clear object in the far distance is a building you'll see later.

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I saw it later too because I got tired. And since he'd fallen asleep anyway, I decided to see if I could nap on one of the "secret" garden benches protected by hedges.

Yep, was able to lie down (and reach into my tight jeans pocket) and not wake him up!

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After a nap, we walked far to that building which had rooms heated to different temperatures.
A tropical room, a cactus desert room, and a building called the orchideum. He got pollen all over himself from this one.

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But Christine knows why this velvet palm was MY favorite!!!
So big (and not black like mine got after a freeze) !

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I then walked back to the apartment, fed him again, and then let him chill to some music. He liked the headphones!

He's asleep now (as I should be). And we head home first thing in the morning.

Thanks for all your past comments. This shall be my last blog for a long time! But it was fun.

It cuts deep...

2008-07-16T15:36:00.000-07:00

Please don’t waste our time if you’re a blurker in for a quick skim. Do that with my last set of photos I posted instead. I don’t think you’ll get it unless you actually take the time to earnestly read this and I’m truly fine if you don’t.

Today I did a lot of thinking.
Inna, our coordinator, a few times, thought I was upset. But I wasn’t. That is too harsh a word, I was more ‘critically pensive’.
I was thinking about me, Christine, and the process, and much of our past thoughts that we’d expressed over the last few months to each other and to family and friends about Dennis and his condition.

I want to start this post with the sincerest of apologies to his birth mother, Strutska Taisia Mykolayivna. I know a lot of adopted children that thank their biological mothers for whatever circumstances that lead to their adoptive parents and I have faith same will prove true in this case.

Perhaps certainty is impossible (without the future genetic testing et al), but based on a long question and answer session with the English-speaking doctor here today, my time with Dennis thus far, and based on theories from California doctors, and my own personal research, I am convinced beyond a shadow of doubt that his condition is/was congenital. This doctor at medical center not only explicitly said this but also explicitly rejected even the possibility of the other leading theory.

I’m more than a bit embarrassed that I swallowed hook, line, and sinker the ‘tantalizing’ “born perfect then cut” story. Even the passport photographer asked the caretaker what happened to Denis and she, just yesterday, propagated again that ‘easy’ tale that I wish had never been told…

Come on people. Cuts or deep slices can happen. But they get stitched up and they heal. And they can leave ugly scars. But even with improper healing, they don’t cause half the issues this child has internally and externally. I can now rattle off a few of many named congenital “syndromes” that could plausibly explain my new son. But I won’t yet. I’m committed to discussing things with a greater confidence than I have been in the past and I hope we all will do same.

Again not upset or even accusing, just critically pensive again about if anyone ever thought the tale, when told, somehow makes Denis more sympathetic or adoptable???

In the spirit of integrity and truth, I’ll confess with plenty of shame, that that story had that effect on me! Maybe I didn’t want to adopt a “freak of nature”? Maybe birth defects like this were a bit out my league or out of my definition of “minor correctable” that I had thought we had on our home study?

But THANK GOD!

Thank God that He’s changed me (yet again). (I stopped crying and can resume typing now). Thank God that He gave me lots of time alone this week with Dennis to be a loving father. He hugs me back so sweetly and already forgives me (Dennis pats MY back!).

I expect and the doctor warned that we’ll have a rough road ahead with Dennis. But it sure beats the easy road without him. Thanks for reading. I wanted to get this off my chest. Nearly 2am here. I better go pat that raised bottom and get to sleep myself.

Trip catchup...

2008-07-16T11:35:00.000-07:00

Inna out. Dennis sleeping for the night after another couple jars of food! And I'm not tired so here's an update...
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It all started here...
The "go straight city" on the sign below in English would be prounounced "Slovansk" and is the little town where Dennis was born, not too far from the town of the orphanage.

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Before I left, people asked me to try and capture on film his first expression of our reuniting. It was a grin even if you can't see it through the glass, which because of "normal quarantine", they said I couldn't pass through.

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This, a better quality photo, of them putting on his first Reed outfit taken a few minutes later.

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And this bittersweet picture was taken right before "final" goodbyes were exchanged. I sensed her sadness and sincerity that she will miss him but is happy for him.

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I think this one is the first taken of the 2 of us before heading to the airport right outside the orphanage. Thanks again Gerardo and Laura for the chocolates!!! They were delicious (sorry kids and Christine).

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And this is one of us on his first plane ride! He was amazing. Only "loudness" for other passengers was an occasional shrieky laugh!!!

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But enough of yesterday!
Today had a cool victory of a daytime nap:

This allowed for me to enjoy a restful lunch that Inna cooked in her apartment called "macaroni paFlotah" (or something like that) meaning, she said, "Navy macaroni"...but it was delicious salty pork and onions over pasta with sourcream. I'm not doing it justice here, but I really enjoyed it.
And this photo captured the essence of Inna too, "always busy working." But what a great job she does...

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...as this was a celebratory meal because of the below being done and in my hands!
That is Dennis's newer visa page of his new passport and the sealed Immigration packet that can only be opened in the U.S. by customs officials. His U.S. citizenship immediately would take effect and his SSN process gets started too!

A good day. Thanks for all your prayers! It's late Wed night now and we have an early Friday morning flight...

From John

2008-07-16T09:29:00.000-07:00

Let's remind you of timeline...Sunday we drove from Tulare to Reedley to go to church.Then I drove from Tulare down to LAX to catch an 8:40pm flight.This flight landed Monday night in Munich, Germany then I took another flight that landed in Kiev near midnite Tuesday morning.

Tuesday mid day I caught a flight from Kiev to Donetsk which landed at 4pm.Driver then drove an hour and a half to Antoshka where, at a late 5:30pm, the director has me sign various paperwork but we need to catch an 8pm flight BACK to Kiev.So the Antoshka good-byes were too short and not sweet enough.I would have loved to spend more time with Camarova's group but they got a quick, "Paka Paka" instead.I would have loved to spend more time with the very gracious and excited Laura and Gerardo but they got a quick, "Thank you for the chocolates, your gift and picture is in the locked director's office" instead.

Emails I was supposed to read were not read (but Director said he has no email and for Inna to share with Lawyer and he'll get it and respond accordingly).So I genuinely am sorry for perhaps not getting as much time and photos as you'd have liked.But Dennis did love to see me. And I got pictures of him sporting his new hat and shoes and new clothes and new dad.In the car, he was great. We both enjoyed the 1970s freedom of roaming around the backseat of a moving car without seatbelts and no one caring. (sorry)

In the kangaroo pouch at the airport, he was great too. Just taking in all the sights and sounds.Inna, Dennis, and I were seats A, B, and C and he enjoyed looking out the window just a little bit.He far preferred opening and closing the tray table on the back of the seat in front of us or dropping his hat on the floor laughing as I grunted to pick it up (ad infinitum).The quick plane ride was great practice for showing me what I'll be up against for the 15hr return flights--I'll need napkins, towels, and bibs galore.

The boy loves to "drink" water from cups that crack as he bites them!!! We had a good wet time!!!It was pouring down rain with flashes of lightning and roaring thunder as we walked out of the plane and onto a bus to take us back to the terminal but he just soaked it all in with never an anxious moment.Finally in the car ride back to Inna's apartment (after 10pm) did he finally do some sleeping on me.This is when I noticed, that like you, he is a teeth grinder.I got him up the 3 floors and Inna took off to do more work, so I needed to get him into dry clothes, dry diapers etc and he is wide awake smiling as all this clothes changing is beautifully happening. Once in dry clothes, I briefly went away from him to hang up his wet outfit when, for the first time, I heard him loudly start to cry.I soon discovered that he now has about a 2 foot radius that he'll cry if I leave.Of course most of me is comprised of the manly, "who cares? let him cry". But I just can't tonight.

It really touched me that me seeming to leave him scared him that much.So he's asleep right next to me (laptop and his foot are on my lap) on the small loveseat by her internet connection as I type this to you.Here's where I've discovered something else very eerie about him.He totally sleeps, very soundly, with BOTH eyes wide open!!!I'm not kidding, I'm looking into his blue eye now and its weird how "dead" he looks among the sounds of his cute snoring.Anyway, I'm quite tired now and want to see if I can sneak over to the couch. But with those eyes still looking at me I don't think I can.We have medicals and embassy stuff to begin tomorrow Wednesday and I'm still planning on flying back out Friday.Love and miss all of you. I promise you I'll blog around this time tomorrow!!!--JR

NEWS FLASH Dennis is in Daddy's arms!

2008-07-15T09:05:00.000-07:00

John called me this morning (our time) to tell me he was in a car heading to the Donetsk airport to catch a plane back to Kyiv....... and Dennis was sitting in his lap.

Praise God!

Dennis has his passport, the orphanage has a picture book of our visits with Dennis last trip, and John donated the bag of coats that our friend Kristen gave. Sadly, that was pretty much all that was done because of the mad dash to get out of there and make their flight. Amy, my husband printed out your email for our translator to give to Antoli....... she will email him in Russian about your update. :)

I am just so excited that Dennis is now with his Daddy! As I was talking to John, I heard Dennis squealing with delight------- not car sickness like I thought. :)

Thank you for all of your prayers.

Christine tells all

2008-07-13T21:39:00.000-07:00

Let me start off by saying that I really have enjoyed reading all of your questions. Some of them had to do with what happened to Dennis and while they were quite personal, I appreciate how delicately you approached the subject. Honestly, I expected you to ask, and I will try to answer as honestly as I can while keeping private the things that I think he will have wanted me to keep private out of respect for him.

This is the post where I will probably share more info about myself and my family then in any other post I have written before, and you probably will get bored before you finish reading, but I nonetheless have promised myself that I will share with you all the answers to your questions. I smiled more than once when I read some of your comments and I am thankful that just when I think that my post is baring my soul a little too much, I can lighten it up by sharing what my favorite flavor of ice-cream is. Thanks, Christie.

Here goes.

About us

It didn't take John and I long before we eloped to Tahoe in December, 1993. We are living proof that opposites do attract and over time we have come to compliment each other------ the secret to our successful marriage. That, and our mutual love for the Lord who we both came to accept and adore in 1996, and there you have the explanation why we will both love each other until death do us part. John and I both feel passionate that I should stay home with the kids, and he provides for all us as a Director of Supply Chain in the fruit and juice business out here in California. We both just celebrated birthdays last month------ I am 33, he is 39.

Did we always want this large of a family? No. What I mean by that answer is that we didn't sit down before marriage and discuss kids or how many either of us both wanted. It is amazing that for the most part, we are both happy about the size of our family. That is what I mean by us complimenting each other. Through our love for the Lord we have both tried to stay in tune with each others desires and we have both come to realize that children are a gift from God. Honestly, I think that something that happened in my past has kept my desire to have more children going, and I thank God that my husband has not been able to find a good reason to quench my desire. We both mutually felt led to adopt after the Asian Tsunamis struck in December 2004, and we have been blessed with the the uniqueness as to how our family has been knit together.

Sadly, I think that John feels our family is now complete..... me on the other hand (and I am sure that some people will not be too pleased to read this)would love to fill up our van. As far as what the future holds.... we'll just have to wait and see. One thing is for sure....... we both agree that Dennis will be keeping us busy for awhile.

I really enjoy driving my fifteen passenger van, and yes I have become quite good at it. My three point turns are actual three point turns now instead of seven and I rarely bump the cars in front of me when I am trying to park (just kidding). We listen to homemade Cds--- that way there is a little of what everyone likes and for the most part we get from point A to point B with me only having to yell once or twice. ;).

As far as getting the kids ready for school or when we have to go somewhere...... they are really good about that. My kids are very responsible and nine times out of ten, they wake me up in the morning.... even on school days. We always make it to first service at our church and my kids are never late to school just because. I admit that I am strict.... no dilly-dallying when it is time to get ready to go somewhere........ we don't put any emphasis on a long fancy beauty regimen. It should only take 31 minutes to get ready in the morning...... five to get dressed, one to fix your bed, ten to brush your teeth, go potty, and do your hair, five to pack your lunch, and five to ten to eat breakfast. Really, if they can't get ready in the morning in 31 minutes or less then that means that they are still tired evidenced by how slow they are moving and should probably go to bed early that night and probably for the rest of the week for that matter, until they can move a little faster in the morning. This may sound strict, but it is what we are all used too, and it works for our family.

Oh, and I think I'm a plain old chocolate ice-cream kind of girl. A bowl late at night eaten next to my husband in bed while watching Letterman is heavenly.

Our Faith

Our family attends the First Baptist Church in our community. You can read all about it here. We both love the Lord and put him at the top of our marriage. We are like a triangle in a three way relationship with John and I at the base of the triangle. As we get closer to God, we move up the triangle, and as a result we become closer to one another.

My Motivation for adopting Dennis

Clear and simple. I absolutely love the joy that children bring. I can no longer have children biologically and yet have never felt done growing my family. I believe that God closed one door and opened another. I cannot explain the desire that God has put into my heart to have so many children......... I guess it would be like someone trying to explain why they feel that having three children is perfect for them. I think that our amazing God lays different things on each of our hearts and that none of us is made to think and feel the same. While I have come to accept that not everyone will understand nor support my feelings on having a large family, I know that it isn't their opinion that I have to care about.

I just do not want to put a box around God and say that we shouldn't have more children just so that we will fit into society. I do not like the excuses, that I can't save the world so I should stop trying. I am not trying to save the world. I do not want to limit what God wants to accomplish through our family. I truly believe that he will satisfy my desire to have children when his plan for our family size is complete. Why wouldn't he? I know tons of people who feel their family is complete and wouldn't even contemplate adding another child to their family. I wanted to adopt Dennis because I do not yet feel that way.

As far as his special needs...... I also feel that by demanding a a perfectly healthy child, I am putting a box around what God wants to accomplish through us. I am so thankful that he laid Dennis on my heart because I know that there are many blessings to come by having this precious child in our lives. I think of how imperfect I am and how devastated I would be had my family and friends chosen to not make me a part of their lives.

I personally enjoy getting to be a part of each of my child's lives and cannot think of doing anything more meaningful in life than to help raise a child that God has entrusted me to temporarily raise and take care of in this short amount time that we are here on earth. Sure, my children will not get as many material things growing up that other children in smaller families will get and we very well may struggle to put them all through college, but I do know that they will grow up having been exposed to family values that will be helpful in raising their own families someday with added patience, humility, tolerance, responsibility, compassion, and knowledge that family is where the heart of everything lies.

James 1:27 (New International Version)
Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world.

About Dennis

Dennis is from the Antoshka orphanage in Kramatorsk in the Donetsk region of Ukraine. He is almost 22 months old but reminds me more of a 12 month old because of his size and lack of stimulation and freedom to interact with other children. He spent the first fourteen months of his life in a hospital. I truly believe that he will continue to catch up by leaps and bounds like we have already seen and that in no time he will be developmentally on target except for his speech. Now I may be completely wrong so don't hold me to this..... but regardless we will always love him to pieces.

As far as Dennis' medical conditions.... we are truly in the dark at this point. In the beginning we were told that his eye and scarring were do to a tragic accident resulting in his mother's parental rights being terminated but have since been told that his injuries happened naturally while he was in the womb. One of the doctors that I contacted went as far as to say that his injuries were caused my facial clefts or amniotic banding. Either way, we saw a very young baby picture of him with his eye the way it is now so we know he has been this way for most if not all of his life. John and I are hopeful that he has some sight in his right eye and might be a candidate for an eye transplant, but we just really don't know. He appears to have a cleft palate that makes eating hard for him---- everything has to be pureed. Of course, we are planning on doing all that we can to help Dennis as soon as possible so that he can live a more normal life and have a less shocking appearance. While it is not necessary that he have any operation to alter his appearance in order for us to be his proud parents, I do think that Dennis would appreciate having a softer first impression as he gets older.

He will most likely need numerous surgeries, and while we don't have the details worked out yet, we have faith that God will work out the logistics in order for us to provide for all of his medical needs. We do have both of our parents that live fairly close, and John's job is very flexible, and our church family and friends always amaze me how they faithfully step up to help when the need calls for it. I don't want to take anything for granted but I do trust that God will carry us through all of this.

Juggling the dynamics of a large family

As far as juggling the needs of all the other children---- I just do it. It is not a big thing---in fact I take care of my children in exactly the same way moms of smaller families take care of theirs--- what choice is there? I do however, find shortcuts that make our lives easier, like always having two of the older kids go to the dentist at the same time where I can just drop them off and have them look out for each other while I run errands and then I swing back by and pick them up when they are done. Little things like that, and really it is not that hard. My son's monthly trip to the orthodontist has been combined with visiting my mom and doing a Costco run. I try to schedule trips to the doctor to coincide with my other son's trips to the dermatologist.

While Dennis in my mind is a healthy little boy I am not kidding myself either. I know that he has special needs and will require numerous medical appointments, surgeries, occupational therapy, and not to mention speech therapy. But that isn't new to me. Four of my other children have or had IEPS with the same types of services. My husband and I have learned to advocate for our children and feel confident that Dennis will receive all of the services he needs to do well in school come time he is ready for kindergarten.

Ukraine

As far as how we were received in Ukraine... I think that went really well. We always made our desire to adopt Dennis regardless of his "imperfections" clear to everyone we met. Sure we got many questions, but once they knew our hearts and intentions, we both felt really comfortable around all of the officials. Were people shocked when we told them we had 10 kids? Of course, but after being in Ukraine and seeing how much more difficult it is to raise kids there compared to here, I can understand why. Most places aren't stroller-kid friendly with ramps and such. Many tall apartment buildings do not have elevators. Unless you find the hole in the wall stores like John and I ventured out to find and are okay with buying less than name brand things for your baby, raising one child in Ukraine is very expensive, let alone ten. We take so many for granted here in America that makes raising a child a breeze compared to raising a child in another country.

Court went well---lasted about an hour. Naturally we were asked lots of questions about our family, home, job, ability to provide for another child, and motivation to adopt a child with special needs, but we never felt like our answers might not be good enough. It really seemed as if the judge was just making sure to see if what was written in our dossier matched with what we said.

Gifts and medical needs

Yes, we have been blessed many times over with donations towards Dennis' adoption, but it never crossed my mind that some of you would be asking to send something once he was home. You guys are just amazing. Let me tell you. I am so thankful for all of your kind and encouraging words, prayers, and donations, that I feel like we have already been blessed more than one could ever imagine. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.

(Amy, I got your package in the mail today. The overalls are adorable. I hope they fit Dennis. You are so very thoughtful....... I wish you were closer so that we could go out for coffee together. Will you please email me your blog again?)

As far as Dennis' medical costs, I am assuming that most of it will be covered by insurance, but if not, we will cross that path when we come to it. My husband is a wonderful provider and we are by no means poor, but I do not think we have thousands of dollars laying around for Dennis medical bills if they are not covered by insurance. However, again I do not feel that God would carry us this far and then leave us high and dry. I just have a feeling that God has amazing plans for this little one, and I trust that his needs will be met one way or another. No matter what happens, I will just always remind myself that he is better off in our family then he was back in the orphanage without anyone to truly love him. I believe that love in itself will prove to be some of the best medicine Dennis will ever get.

Our family

Thank God, our family has been supportive. Naturally we were met with some questions, but I have no doubt in my mind that they will all fall in love with Dennis once they meet him if they haven't already. :)

I have a wonderful relationship with my mother and she is a huge help to us. My in-laws are extraordinary. I have been truly blessed by my husband's parents and they are the most amazing grandparents to our children.

We have an amazing extended family as well, and they have all been very supportive.

Out in public

As I close, I do want to address how I handle those odd and often times rude questions that people ask.

First off, not all people are rude. Many have been very complimentary and uplifting. But for those who have felt compelled to ask some off the wall comment....... I fantasize about giving them some off the wall response back.

"Are all of those kids yours?"

You don't know how many times I have been tempted to say, "No, are you kidding? I just like to go around and pick up all the neighbor kids when I go shopping so that I don't get lonely."

But I don't. And I try not to let it anger me. Honestly, I find their questions amusing and just try to answer as politely as possible. I always think of this as an opportunity to shine a light for Jesus.

Too many to count

2008-07-12T22:22:00.000-07:00

While in Ukraine, John opened up a whole new world to Dennis---------- a water world. Not only did Dennis appreciate when either of us gave him a drink of water, but Dennis absolutely loved when Daddy let him play with it.

Here are some up close and personal pictures of Dennis and his Daddy.

Dennis reached out to touch us all the time. I can't help but think how much physical touch and nurturing he has missed out on. This is where he will be blessed coming into our large family. He has 12 people just waiting to dote on him....... especially his Mama.

I just love this picture. Dennis is wondering why his hand feels all wet. I wonder how he is going to respond to his first bath.

Isn't he just adorable? Something about this picture and how he is letting John give him a drink. Oh, how I miss this little guy.

For those of you wondering, John flies out tomorrow evening on Lufthansa. Once in Ukraine, he will then fly out to the Donetsk region on the 15th to finally be reunited with our son. From that point on John will have custody of Dennis and they will scurry to get Dennis' passport before heading back to Kyiv where Dennis will have a medical to complete the paperwork at the Embassy. God-willing they will both be on a plane on the 18th heading home.

Admittedly, we were both very upset when we learned that the 10 days would not be waived because of the prosecutor. After reading letters from a pediatric plastic surgeon here in California and from the director of the orphanage who is also a doctor who both said that Dennis needs immediate medical attention, the judge was planning on waiving the 10 days only to learn that the prosecutor was threatening to cause trouble and hold us up for months appealing the judge's decision. As a favor, the judge didn't waive the 10 days.

But I have to again say how good God is. In the midst of this not so wonderful news, God was showing us that he is right there to provide no matter what. He has shown us numerous blessings since our court date. Not only did this 10 day wait give us a chance to come home early to see our kids, but it also gave me a chance to prepare for Dennis' arrival, and also witness the continual love and support from all of you. I am continually humbled by how many of you have asked to donate since we have been home. Total strangers have asked if they could send a little something for our new son. Fellow adoptive parents have offered to mail hand me downs. And even some very concerned readers/friends have contacted doctors on our son's behalf. Talk about blessings------ I don't think I could even count them all---- there are just so many. Thank you. I can't help but feel that Dennis is one very loved little boy.

Psalm 127:3 (Contemporary English Version)

Children are a blessing
and a gift from the LORD.

Ain't that the truth?

Dennis' Adoption Video

2008-07-10T22:01:00.000-07:00

Here is the video of our adoption of Dennis. I hope you all enjoy it as much as I have enjoyed making it.

I have to admit that I have been preoccupied with making this video the last three evenings. Making it has been so therapeutic for me..... I've missed Dennis' smile something fierce. I can't wait to make a montage when he gets home!

A Piggy for Dennis

2008-07-10T10:50:00.000-07:00

Isn't this pig adorable? Made by Julia a.k.a. excited big sister to be. While we were in Ukraine, Julia handmade this cute little stuffed animal with Grandma. It sweetly waits in Dennis' bed till he comes home on the 18th.

I have enjoyed all of your comments and questions very much, and will soon post an entry that answers them all.

Things for Dennis

2008-07-08T22:08:00.000-07:00

Now that Dennis is truly our son, I can safely buy what I think he needs without fear that maybe we won't complete his adoption. HE IS OUR SON! So this Mama went out and bought some things for her little boy.

In Ukraine, we bought these trusiki (boys' tights) just in case the ten days were waived and we got to bring him home. We needed something that met the orphanage caretaker's approval. The couple of short outfits I brought would never suffice. The way they like to bundle up the children is utterly ridiculous, but we were more than willing to comply because of our excitement of finally getting to take Dennis home.

Just tonight I went out and bought these outfits. (Thanks Kristen for the Target gift card). I think the green tights will go great with the green shorts. Don't you? :)

The one thing that I wasn't expecting with Dennis is that he needs everything to be pureed for him. In fact, baby food is right up his alley. We bought the Bebi cereal in Ukraine and was told that Dennis couldn't eat it(yet they fed him stuff like that). You just wait and see till I post a picture of him wolfing down spoonfuls of this yummy stuff mixed with applesauce.

Feel Free to Ask

2008-07-07T22:23:00.000-07:00

Over the past few weeks, I have been asked many questions about our adoption, our family, our motivation, our faith, and our son. I am so sorry that I have not taken the time to answer all of the questions and so I wanted to take this time to do so now. So if you have any questions, any at all, please feel free to ask them now. I'll probably be too busy in a week to answer then so you best get them off your chest now. :)

BTW, all of you have been so encouraging that I just wanted to let you all know how terrific I think you all are!

We made it home.....but missing Dennis

2008-07-07T15:05:00.000-07:00

We made it home safe and sound around 2:30am on July 5th. I'd be lying if I said it didn't feel absolutely wonderful crawling into my own bed that night, but I'd also be lying if I didn't say that I feel like a part of me is missing with Dennis still back in Ukraine. I miss him. John misses him. He is constantly in our thoughts and I am preparing like a mad woman nesting for his arrival on the 18th.

Dennis loves skin on skin contact even if that means resting on his Mama's jiggly jello legs.

Dennis loved playing with Daddy's cell phone. "How does Daddy make it play music, but I can't?"

We left this photo album with Dennis so that he could look at it everyday. We even asked his caretakers to leave it in his crib. Thanks to whoever suggested leaving a blanket with our son so that he could still remember our scent even though we are not there with him. Now if only I had remembered to bring home something with his scent.

On our last visit with Dennis, it seemed as if he knew that something was up. Children are so intuitive that I'm sure he realized that we were leaving.

John and I wondered how long it would take for Dennis to accept our attempts at consoling him when he got hurt and was in pain. Dennis showed us on the last day that he would indeed accept our love, hugs and kisses when he needed them most. Here he is crying his sweet little innocent cry after falling as he was trying to push himself up to a sitting position. My whispering, "Ya Lublu Tebya," as I held him close calmed him down. John rubbing his head probably helped too.

Our son Dennis

2008-07-03T09:19:00.000-07:00

This is the last picture we took with our son before saying goodbye. John and I have decided that it is best that we go back home for now and wait out the 10 days----- this decision did not come easy. Everyone sensed that Dennis knew something was up. :( But do not worry, Dennis will not have to wait long. We are already trying to book a flight for him to return on the 14th of July to pick him up. Our facilitator has been wonderful and will do her best to get as much done as she can before John gets back. This next trip should only be three or so days. :)

We have to say goodbye for now as we are getting ready to catch a train (the Ukraine Train!) out of Kramatorsk.

Introducing Dennis Jack Reed!!!

2008-07-03T02:43:00.000-07:00

Today was apparently a good day. After all, we had our court date, and he's our son now. Our coordinator had even "won over" the heart of the judge and jury to waive our 10 days...
But this is never waived and has never been waived in Kramatorsk. Even now. The heart, or lack of such, of the prosecutor was not won over. He essentially said that if the judge ruled illegally to pursue with the "immediate decision", then we would be fighting the prosecutor for the next few MONTHS. He was against it the whole time and logic and reason and compassion was not going to pursuade him.
Nevertheless, Dennis is ours and we can show his pictures now and so here are a few...
As to what exactly the next few days and weeks look like, we aren't certain yet--we are waiting to see if tickets to Kiev are available, flight date changes, etc. But it is entirely possible that we are going to return immediately (as soon as practical that is) to home in California to relieve family and friends that have been holding down the fort as well as to get John back to work. John may have to take another week off mid July to return to Ukraine to get Dennis.
But none of this is certain yet and we'll keep options open and communicated later as known...

This is an early one of him and the balls from the ball pit that always made him smile.

This is a good one of the three of us...

Checking to hear Dad's heart beat...

Napping in mama's arms after a great long nature walk...

Ditto but dad's arms this time...

And the star of this blog!!!
--JR

Wednesday in Kramatorsk

2008-07-02T09:45:00.000-07:00

I took this picture bright and early this morning at the begining of our walk to the orphanage. Doesn't John fit right in with the locals in his shorts drinking his ice cold Pepsi? Nyet.

After our morning visit we walked about 1 1/2 miles to my favorite inexpensive place to eat, Premier. We were about 15 minutes early so we sat down on a bench to do our favorite thing in Ukraine besides visiting with Dennis------ people watching.

This gentleman rushed by us in his wheelchair and I thought cool---- it is awseome to see a disabled man out and about in this country. Since it really is a rarity to see anyone out and about if they have a disability, I asked John to take a picture. He had to run, and run, and run, to catch up to him. Don't let the wheelchair fool you----- he is fast as lightening. And no we didn't look rude taking his picture, I cropped it to look close up.

Here we are at the cafe. This picture kind of reminds me of pictures of our honeymoon almost 15 years ago.

I took this picture of John to show you the bright red haired woman to the left of him. Lots of woman find this hair color very fashionable here in Ukraine.

We ordered two awesome entrees. I had chicken and mushrooms over a bed of noodles all in a cream sauce (John ordered it the day before) and John had pork cutlets with a mustard garlic topping and mashed potato hush puppies in a plum barbecue sauce. Yummy.

On our second visit, John asked if we could feed Dennis his food. They said yes and gave him this bowl of food for us to feed our little guy. We think it is called zeppikanka------it had cottage cheese, eggs, sugar, and raisins baked to perfection in a sweet milk sauce. To Dennis it was delicious, to John who I dared to try it, it was the last bite he will ever have of this Ukrainian delight.

During one of our two visits, Dennis filled his pants. While under normal circumstances I wouldn't be so excited, I was this time because I had the opportunity to watch one of his caretakers change him (and see the rest of his body for the first time). She laid him on the changing table and turned on the faucet next to it. While the water was warming, she wiped his bottom with the rest of the diaper the best she could. Dennis patiently kept his legs in the air as to not mess up the changing table until the water was warm. The caretaker then took off his shoes and socks and proceeded to wash Dennis under the running water. She lathered up her hands and washed his whole lower body clean. And he loved it! And I got to help put on a fresh diaper---- a size two--- which was still a little too big.

Tomorrow is court and so we will update you then. Pray, pray, pray. Oh, and we'll post lots of pictures!

Shoes at the end of the rainbow

2008-07-01T11:04:00.000-07:00

Dennis has a cute little tummy (with a button nose) if I do say so myself. :) And hopefully it is only getting bigger with each visit. In the morning he wolfs down a big mashed up banana and in the afternoon we give him a whole jar of baby food. We are so tempted to sneak in some kasha (rice cereal).

On one of our walks outside today we saw this play pen dressed with a blanket and bumper pad. It is so big, I could have taken a nice nap in it.

I think it was for a child that was having a lot of family members visit them.

This tree has a kind of flower that almost looks like cotton. It was very pretty.

After our morning visit we went walking around with the two other adopting couples. They are very, very nice and though they are not from America, the Israel couple speaks very good English and the Spanish couple is able to communicate with John pretty good. They informed us that the other Spanish couple that was here adopting a little girl changed their mind and went back to Kyiv for another appt because they got scared. I know I shouldn't judge, but what are they scared of..... a cute, little girl? My heart is broken for this little girl who after spending time with a couple who she already was beginning to come to know as Mama and Papa for the last three or so days is now left having to try to understand why they are no longer visiting her anymore. I probably should have more compassion for this couple, but what about this little girl? I just wish the decision could have been made much sooner before the little girl had a chance to realize what was going on.

Moving off my soapbox, we had a wonderful time getting to know these wonderful parents to be, and enjoyed a delicious yet very inexpensive lunch at Premier Elite Cafe.

A beautiful flying green beetle joined us.

We had a good laugh as we compared keys to our apartments. And we found some wonderful things for Dennis that we bought.

At 6pm today as we were walking home, Kramatorsk had a huge downpour.

Then our Heavenly Father gifted us with a gorgeous rainbow.

And I was so happy that we found shoes for Dennis that I feel like I found the (imaginary) pot of gold at the end of rainbow. They are size 13---probably equivalent to a size 2 in America. Oh, and did I mention that they were only 25 grivna?

Aren't they adorable?

Probably sounds strange but it feels good to finally have your child wear something that you have provided for them instead of everything being from the orphanage.

Monday, June 30

2008-06-30T09:48:00.000-07:00

I am feeling much better thank you. I ate some Activa yogurt in hopes that it would help and when all of you commented about it, I went out and got some more. I am definitely doing much better than yesterday's post.

We got to Dennis' orphanage at 9 am sharp and we only had to wait 10 minutes for them to get him ready.

Everyday he is becoming more and more curious. It is wonderful to see that the same things do not continually entertain him--- that he is interested in exploring his surroundings. Today Dennis showed us how strong he was by tossing around this full water bottle.

He wanted to play with this swing, but not for very long. During the morning visit, we took him
outside for a longer period of time. Dennis loves to watch the other kids play. Good thing because this afternoon, Kramatorsk got some rain.

Here is a picture of a woman doing laundry at the orphanage. With around 120 kids you would think that they would be doing laundry everyday, but they don't. It also appears that they only diaper the children that are being adopted because they ask the parents to buy diapers. In Dennis' room is a little girl probably not older than 3 months and everytime we come to get Dennis, I peak through the window to get a glimspe of her and she is lying in her crib naked from the waste down. It is pretty warm in the orphanage so don't worry about whether or not she is cold, but her tiny little cry is enough to make your heart ache. A couple of times that I have peaked in on her she was rooting because her arm had gotten free from her swaddle and it kept hitting her mouth. So cute, but oh so sad. But, I can blog about that on another day.

Here is the trash truck that I was telling you about. A man dressed way too nice for his job manuevers the levers to lift the trash can while a woman comes behind him and sweeps up all of the trash that is left behind. I hope that sometimes they take turns doing each others job.

This is a porch leading up to the inside of an apartment building that is under construction. I bet it will be this way for weeks if not months. This was how many of the bridges that we needed to cross to get to Kramatorsk from Kyiv looked. No detour, no notice, just drive until you realize that you are about to enter dangerous territory.

Today we went looking for shoes for Dennis at the big bazaar. Couldn't find any. :( I may just have to stuff the shoes I brought for him.

Lots of vendors were selling beautiful flowers. It smelled so good walking through this aisle.
One vendor was selling these paintings. I love the third one with all the bears playing.

On the way back to our apartment, I took some pictures. I don't know how these shops stay open. It is not like they were hustling with customers...... and today is a holiday.

Mannequins in Ukraine? No way! Hey doesn't that one on the left look a lot like my husband?

Trying to stay upbeat here......... got some disappointing news. The judge called our facilitator and told us that because he has so many criminal cases tomorrow he has moved our courtdate to Thursday. We just have to trust that God has a plan. Now if only those plans include getting our 10 days waived.

Hot Dog Blinni

2008-06-30T05:09:00.000-07:00

We've all heard of the Swedish-pankcake-like Russian staple, the blinni, right? Sometimes eaten just plain, or with sugar, or sugar and mayonnaise, or fruit--in fact, the apple Blinni that Christine had in Kiev was her favorite meal so far. Well today, the couple in line in front of us ordered a Hot Dog Blinni so we felt, "When in Rome..." and got one too. Here is it's picture and the video of Christine eating it...

All for now...I got to wake her up and we get to go see Dennis again...

Sunday in Kramatorsk

2008-06-29T10:59:00.000-07:00

Another day with Dennis. Each day he is more and more happy to see us. His poor eye was quite crusty and we know he cries when he has it cleaned out. I was not brave enough to be the one to do it. I better toughen up soon. Somehow I think that having warm water poured over his head in a nice bath will naturally clean out his eye. I have the feeling that they rarely bathe the kids here.

This is a close up of the art on the walls of the orphanage. Yes, it is on styrofoam backing.

Here is a beautiful wood carving of a mother and child.

On the walk home we passed this building.

Here is a close up of the first floor apartment.

This would be my mom's house if she lived in Ukraine. She loves plants and flowers.

Here is some cute sidewalk art drawn with chalk. I bet you didn't think they did that in Ukraine, did you?

And here is some not so nice graffiti art. Funny how it is all in English.

We had leftover chicken that we were getting rid of so we thought the cats might like it.

We were right.

On one of our walks today we passed an old man sifting through trash for recyclables. We will definitely be saving our bottles until the next time we see him.

2008-06-29T09:58:00.000-07:00

Yesterday, Christine caught me with the camera and I spontaneously started saying Hi and things to my kids. So from Sony mini DVD to compressed MPEG and from YouKraine to UTube, this blog is for them from Daddy.

The other 10%

2008-06-29T02:59:00.000-07:00

Probably up until now you have gotten the picture in your mind that our adoption journey and Ukraine has been nothing but glorious and wonderful. Hey, honestly 90% of this journey has been, but to leave you with the impression that our our trip, my feelings about Ukraine, and my feelings for my son have been a fairy tale would not be fair. As with everything I have had a few up and down moments.

First off, I think I am sick. Not sure if it is a stomach bug or an actual parasite, but something is upsetting my stomach with continual diarrhea. This is more information than you want to hear, I'm sure, but I think it is important to accept the possibility of this happening to you if you travel to another country. While my tummy doesn't feel very good, I guess there is always an upside. Who knows, at this rate, I may be 10 or 15 pounds lighter when I get home.

Ukraine is really a wonderful country........ I feel more at home here than I did when I was in Russia a couple of years back. This may be because I have done this once before, or maybe because I am able to keep in touch with friends and family through email and this blog. It may also be that this part of Ukraine is less intimidating (Moscow was huge) yet more technologically advanced. Is this possible? We have visited stores that resemble Wal-Marts, have seen more handicap/stroller accessible ramps around here, and have seen evidence that some sort of trash system is in place here. In Russia, they simply burned their trash.

However, there are things about Ukraine that make me feel a little bit uncomfortable like the foul smelling stairwells that lead up to our apartment. While the apartment itself is very nice, as soon as you walk out the door into the common stairwell you might as well be in a bad part of town. It has flies, trash, and graffiti, and smells of urine with occasional spots on the ground indicating that some drunkard had peed in the corner. Not very pleasant.

The mentality of people in this country never cease to amaze me. In this country you can call your own ambulance and request your own concoction of pain-killing sedatives and antibiotics without a doctor, yet you can't sit on a wall because it will cause sickness in your bones. You better believe that I have gotten some rude glares because I have taken a load off my feet and sat down on a wall.

When ordering at a restaurant it would be best if you could bring your own condiments like butter, ketchup, etc. because these things will not be offered to you and for sure they will not be free. Everything is a la carte and many times the price that is printed on the menu is per kilogram, not for the whole item on the menu. We learned this one afternoon when we took our facilitator and driver out for lunch. We thought our bill would be around 150 grivna and it ended up being 231 grivna. Also, water is not free---- ever! But at least you don't have to pay to use the restroom.

There is a unique smell to Ukraine, that you eventually get used to, but if you have a sensitive nose, you best breathe through your mouth. Don't worry, it grows on you.

The smell in the orphanage however is hard to get used too. I love it when the smell of food is in the air to mask the true-lying smell of it...... that is soaked into Dennis' clothes and hair. While he has a sweet baby smell about him, that I admit is probably more of a figment of my imagination, I long for the day that I can take him out of here and give him a bath and put him in the clothes that we brought for him.

Everything about Dennis is perfect, at least in our eyes, but we are allowed to do only so much with him. Like I mentioned earlier, there are so many senseless rules here that John and I feel unable to parent Dennis in the way that we want. They don't want his shoes and socks off, we can't feed him hardly anything, we can never be too careful with how we hold him (as if we are going to drop him), we can't take him to certain places of the orphanage for fear of germs, we have to feed him a certain way, and we are not allowed to tuck him back into his crib after visits. It makes no sense to us........but because this is their country and they supposedly know him best, then we will follow their rules until he is officially ours! Maybe longer if they don't waive the 10 days.

This orphanage appears to have both healthy and special needs children. Like our initial visit with Anna and Sveta at the orphanage we were not sat down and given the details of Dennis' medical until we asked. To us, it doesn't matter what they tell us because we still want our son no matter what they say, but admittedly I am curious to see what they have to say. I guess we'll know everything they want us to know once we have the translated court documents.

I hope none of this has discouraged anyone thinking of adopting from Ukraine from doing so, nor did I intend to offend anyone who has been to Ukraine and has a diferent view. I just wanted to share my perspective on things as honestly as I possibly could.

Did I mention that one time I opened the door of a gas station bathroom and it was full of flying moths that swarmed around me while I did my business? Not three or four mind you......closer to three or four hundred all attracted to the light. I felt like I was in the scene of a horror movie.

Sorry to seem like such high maintenence. Spoiled by America.

Saturday, June 28 in Kramatorsk

2008-06-28T09:32:00.000-07:00

Today is the first day that we are on our own. Nothing to do except visit Dennis. How nice. After some coffee and cereal we headed for the orphanage, but decided to take a different way and explore a bit.

Here are the beautiful wild flowers I was telling you about. I don't think anyone out here owns a lawn mower, but there are wild floweres and planted flowers everywhere.

I think this is part of a school track and field playground.

Someone asked me if there were women joggers in Ukraine. Yes, there are and here is one to prove it!

This has got to be a school. We couldn't think what else it could be. Funny how the fence has a 1 1/2 foot gap at the bottom---- looks like kids could sneak out easily.

I took this picture because I thought it was good to see a man helping out around the house. Here he is beating out a big red rug.

On the way to Dennis' room, I got a sneak peak of what appears to be the orphanage kitchen. Wonderful smells of eggs and compote filled the air.

The nurses gave us a banana to feed Dennis for the third time in a row. Pour guy probably eats nothing but bananas here in the orphanage. We bought him Mango puree, Strawberry puree, rice cereal, and yogurt. They wouldn't let us feed him anything except for the food in the baby jar. They said he can't have it ------ yet the baby food had yogurt in it. Go figure. Having been through this with Anna and Sveta we thought to ourselves, "That's what you think. When he is out of here we are going to give it all to him!"

We decided to explore the orphanage and found this cool room with a big bird cage. Dennis couldn't take his eyes off of the colorful, singing birds.

Dennis is trusting us more and more each day and enjoys going on walks with us. In the beginning he was a little hesitant to go with us but he now knows that we are not strangers. We are his Mamotchka and Papithcka!

John sure knows how to tire out Dennis. Here they are taking a break.

We broke one of the biggest no-no's here at the orphanage by taking off his socks. Shhhh- don't tell nobody. Would they have preferred that we keep his socks on and let him slip and fall as he was holding on to things and walking around? Socks are slippery on wood floors. Plus, I wanted another chance to look at his cute little feet.

Towards the end of both visits, we took Dennis outside for a walk. He is very sensitive to the light and appreciated the hat that we brought for him. After a while, he fell asleep in our arms. To us, it is a sign of trust. I wouldn't want to fall asleep in the arms of someone who I didn't trust. Would you? Also, two days ago, I don't think he would have.

Today we washed a small load of clothes.

Ladies, this is the size of washing machines in Ukraine. And there are no dryers, even in more lavish apartments which ours is considered to be.

And last but not least, here I am hanging out our clothes to dry.

As I close, I wanted to share that I decided to try kefir. I mixed it with the cherry compote and it was very yummy, kind of like a yogurt drink. Thanks for the suggestion.

Again, I am so blessed by all of your comments. At the end of the day, I come over to the computer to read them and suddenly feel as if I am not so far from America. Thank you. We miss you kids and hope you are being good! Oh and Anna, it is not nice to say be quiet to an adult. I hope you told your sister that.

Our third day in Kramatorsk

2008-06-27T10:38:00.000-07:00

Good evening from Kramatorsk, Donetsk! We have water..... and it looks as if it is not temporary....... at least until the next pipe breaks. Our facilitator has been working very hard getting documents notarized, submitted, sent off on the train back to Kiev, etc. etc. where she is headed back to do a couple more things necessary for the adoption process. Again, we couldn't be happier with how wonderful she is.

Come time to visit Dennis, we decided to walk since it is only around 15 minutes away by foot.

Come join us.......... this is main drag we walk down. Wild flowers or pretty weeds, which ever you want to call them, scatter the empty field on either side of us.

The castle like building and wall behind the recycle bins are the orphanage walls. It is neat to see that Ukraine is attempting to recycle. Too bad we haven't seen too many people doing it.

I had the privelege of being shown around the orphanage. Going up the stairs and down the halls had all of these wonderful pieces of art with styrofoam backing.

Here is the one of the nurse's rooms. We have to go through that door every morning to sign in.

And here is the star of this blog-------Dennis!

Once again he was bright eyed and bushy tailed when we came in to get him. Because the nurses didn't have him quite ready for us to take him, I had the privelege of checking in on him through his bedroom window. Instantly he spotted me and we locked eyes. It was a good feeling.

Dennis continues to amaze us-------- it is like he has been introduced to a whole new world. He wants to explore everything and has come to adore his Daddy already!

I love this picture of Dennis on Daddy's shoulders!

At first, he wasn't too sure about these balls. But Daddy made them fun.

Dennis enjoyed this swing very much. Not so much the swinging part, but he really liked playing with the little balls that slid up the rope. We could only push him ever softly because his balance is not too good yet. Though I don't have pictures, we got to feed Dennis mashed banana and later, baby food that we brought. After hearing how the caretakers feed Dennis, we had no trouble feeding him the pureed food. I am glad to see that he enjoys eating with little trouble afterall, just as long as it is pureed.

In between visits with Dennis, we went to the notary, post office, and courthouse. It was a very busy day but we also managed to stop for coffee and ice-cream and enjoy a little bit of down time.

By one of the post offices was this children's play area. They have them all over Ukraine. It is really a wonderful thing------ wish we had them back home. I would say our swingsets in our backyards are equivalent to them.

Next to the courthouse they had this mini bazaar--- like a farmer's market. We walked up and down the rows and got to see all of the different things they had for sale.

Since the shoes we brought are way too big for Dennis, we looked for new ones but didn't find any. :(

John is standing in front of what we know as Home Depot back home.

There was lots of fresh produce for sale. We bought fingerling potatoes, pickling cucumbers, and tasty tomatoes. Very inexpensive.... only a couple of grivna.

As we were leaving, I saw this Babushka selling cherries and strawberries. They were both very tiny berries and the strawberries were quite pathetic looking. We passed on the strawberries but bought a cup of the cherries which turned out to be very tart. Our driver pointed out back in the car that we could have picked these cherries off of any of the trees growing along the sidewalk. But it didn't matter to us because we wanted to help the Babushka who by the way was very very nice as was every vendor we bought from.

Around 3:30 pm, our facilitator came out of the courthouse to inform us that we have a courtdate! Tuesday, July 1 at 9:00 am we will have court to offically adopt Dennis and make him a Reed! Hooray!

Before our facilitator left for Kyiv, John and I wanted to cook her a homemade meal.

We made potatoes fried in butter, cucumber-tomato-lemon salad, fried eggs, and bread and butter. It was very simple but we all agreed it was delicious.

Later, I stewed up those tart cherries with lots of sugar. And to my girls reading back home---the cherries turned out delicious---- better than the berry compote I make at home.

As I close, I must say that while I feel very at home here, I do miss my family and own home back in good ol' California. Being here has once again humbled me greatly as I look around the kitchen I am cooking in and compare it to my own luxurious American kitchen. Everything here is half the size of what my own kitchen is minus a dishwasher, can opener, ice maker, and garbage disposal. Makes me think twice about complaining that I don't have a second oven.

Answered prayers and the train

2008-06-26T13:45:00.000-07:00

I wasn't quite sure what to title this post------ but I named it after the two main things mentioned in this post.

As I ended in my last post, we went back to see Dennis at 4 pm. Oddly enough, I had just talked to John earlier about how I kind of wished that I could hear Dennis cry so that I could know what he sounded like and pick up on it a mile away. Up to this point we still hadn't heard much from him although he is warming up to us more and more.

When we got to the orphanage and walked into the waiting area where his room was, we heard him crying. It was a cry that I will now never forget. Poor little guy was having his eye cleaned out and you could tell that it hurt him to have it done. My instinct was to rush in and grab him up but I knew that I was not in the position to do so------yet and neither was John. So we cried with him as we waited for what seemed like an eternity for them to hurry up and bring Dennis out to us. He was still crying when they brought him to us and John and I both immediately tried to console him. Admittedly, John was much better at doing so and we were then able to take him to the play area. His scars were all red from the crying and it took a while for his coloring to return to normal. I know this is something that he goes through everyday, but honestly I didn't think about it before now. I feel so protective of him and wish with all my heart that we can help him the best that we can once he is home to make everyday life a little easier for him.

I love this picture. Dennis is an absolute doll. He has learned to do things in his own way that John and I are only beginning to pick up on. While you would think that he would prefer to lay down on the side of his good eye as to not hurt the other one, he actually prefers to lay down on the side of the bad eye because this allows him to still see everything. If his bad eye was the one looking out, it would be useless.

He tends to crawl sideways because of how he sees things but compensates by adjusting himself to go the other way so that his crawling is kind of like a zigzag. He is so close to walking by himself but until I actually saw that he could crawl I tried not to encourage it. I didn't want him to miss this important developmental stage, but we now know that their is nothing to worry about.

The shoes that I bought him are way too big! His feet are tiny (not to mention kissable) ---probably because he was around 4.6 pounds when he was born.

On another note, many couples are here adopting right now. Two couples from Spain, one from Israel, and one Ukrainian couple who are both doctors. Probably more will come before we are finished here. While John's Spanish has come in handy for communicating with the Spanish couples, I kind of wish at least one of the couples adopting was from America so that we could communicate even better and possibly make friends. Oh well, just part of God's plan I'm sure. :)

After visiting Dennis, we had to go to the train station to send off some documents to Kyiv. We finally got to see our Ukraine Train!

Here is the front of the station.

This is not the first stray dog to see in Kramatorsk. I wish I had something to feed the skinny little thing.

I pretended to take this picture of John so that I cold actually get a picture of the police in the background. Hope I didn't do something illegal. Don't you love their hats?

Here is an actual Ukraine Train. Now I can say that I have at least officially seen one. I came close to being hit with one too because I stupidly followed the others in my party across the train walk without realizing how fast the train was actually going. Don't worry Mom, I wasn't that close.

After the train station we got dropped off at the apartment and we decided to go shopping to buy John some Coca Cola and Dennis some baby food and juice. We came upon this and found the real reason as to why this part of the city doesn't have water. Our facilitator explained that when a pipe gets old and breaks down, the city repairs it like this and therefore has to shut down all of the water in the surrounding city. No joke. Broken pipe means no water for a week or until the problem is solved------ and no they do not work at night. Tihngs like this make me so thankful that I live in America.

Spending time in Kramatorsk

2008-06-26T04:43:00.000-07:00

Had to post this picture to let all of you know that John finally got his milk last night. Let me tell you---- he enjoyed his bowl of cereal.

We are loving our time in Ukraine in general. We have been surrounded by some of the most wonderful people and we can't say anything negative about our experience thus far. I personally feel like I couldn't be in better hands with our in-country facilitator. She is amazing, down to earth, and while our relationship is probably supposed to be more on a professional level, I've enjoyed getting to know her on a more personal level. I know that I will miss everyone here once we leave. Last night we sat up quite late drinking homemade Coffee Americana with the owner of the apartment as her son set up high-speed internet for us, our facilitator, and our driver. I was in good company.

Last night, the owner heard that all of the water would be shut off for a couple of days and so she prepared by filling every empty bottle and pot in her home. John doubted such a thing would happen but just as I finished taking my shower at nearly midnight last night, the water did get shut off! And has only been on a brief amount of time in the early morning since last night. Thankfully, we have the water in the pots.

Here is a view outside of our apartment window. Very nice.

I think Dennis would enjoy watching the birds feed. Someone was here spending time with the birds yesterday evening. Reminded me of the episode of Hey Arnold (a kids cartoon) where there is a pigeon man.

Around 8:45 this morning, we were off to visit Dennis. Today we had a driver since we had to go to the notary between visits, but tomorrow we will walk to and from the orphanage.

When we got to the orphanage to visit, we had to make sure that at least one of us checked in by signing a book. Then we were allowed to go to Dennis' room.

They brought him to us all fresh and smiling with his hair combed back............. a stark contrast from yesterday's first meeting. I really got the sense he remembered us. His outfit, although still an orphanage outfit was adorable. His pants were pulled up to his chest....... but on him his outfit looked so cute.

I know you guys are probably waiting for a picture of his sweet smile----but neener-neener- neener you'll have to wait till after court per Ukrainian law. We are hoping that that may be as soon as early next week!

Have I told you just how smart Dennis is? At first he was holding and drinking from the water bottle that John had given to him. Once he saw me get out the little cow and sit it on his lap Dennis quickly chucked his beloved water bottle on the floor since he thought he was now getting something better. :) Very typical for a small child. :)

Here is a picture of him crinkling up the photo page I was telling you about yesterday. I'm not sure if you can tell, but his hands are so petite and just beautiful. On his right hand he does have some redness that the orphanage doctor says is from him gnawing on his hand and finger but thankfully it is looking a little better today. Yeah!

Dennis loves to wrap his little fingers around ours-----especially to pull himself up.

Not long after we started visiting with Dennis we were asked if we wanted to take Dennis outside to watch a program that the orphanage was doing for the kids. Of course we said yes....... who would want to miss that?

Here they are instructing the kids about an obstacle course they will be doing-----kind of like a gymnastic event------baby style. I must say that the kids are very well taken care of here. The orphanage staff do a tremendous job of caring for each of these children.

Near the end of the program everyone got up and danced, including John. They also danced to "I wanna be a chicken." It was so cute to watch the children move around.

Within minutes of the program starting, a doctor came to take Dennis to get a full medical report on him. It was nice to see things moving along so quickly with our process.

Though we were free to go, we asked to stick around to play with the children. It was wonderful playing with all of them. This frog that wanted to kiss and eat their noses kept their attention for a very long time. A few children I could tell had FAS-----but their personality was such that I wish I could take them all home. But honestly that wouldn't be fair to Dennis at this time because he needs our full attention as do our other children at home---which being surrounded by these children made us also miss. We miss you Adam, Caleb, Rachel, Julia, Annalyn, Sveta, Anna, William, Andrew, and Jonny! So instead, I will be coming home looking for families for all of these children, so start spreading the word. :)

We asked the children if they wanted to put the puppet frog on their hand. Only this little girl was brave enough to give it a try.

While waiting for our facilitator to get back from the notary, we went for a walk around the orphanage and surrounding area.

Here is whimsical piece of art on the orphanage wall near the front door.

These look like a long strip of garages separate from the tall apartment buildings behind us. Kind of like a mini storage unit back in California.

This road was made of dirt and led to somewhere beautiful.... I imagine. Can't say for sure because we didn't have time to explore. Maybe tomorrow.

Not too long after this, we said goodbye until 4:00 PM and headed off to have lunch.

We took out our driver and facilitator for lunch----- a very small token to show our appreciation for all that they have done for us. We had a delicious lunch----- I had a garden salad with tomatoes, cucumbers, red peppers, and dill, later followed by quail lapsha with hard boiled quail eggs and chunks of quail meat. Very tasty. John had Trout shashlick and vegetable rice which was also very tasty.

After lunch we headed to the notary to sign documents and after we visited a park across the street.

In the middle of the park was this fountain surrounded by water. It was fun to watch three children running in the water. If we lived here, there would have been thirteen in the water. :)

Since it is about time to go and visit Dennis again, I will say goodbye for now. But I will leave you with one last picture of......... a Ukraine bus.

Meeting Dennis!

2008-06-25T22:50:00.000-07:00

We drove all last night and had a two hour delay because most of the bridges to cross to another road were closed off and under construction. We literally had to find a way to drive on the opposite side of the road and go up an on-ramp against traffic. Thankfully, the road was mostly empty, but as we did this, we both thought, "Only in Ukraine." Other than this, the drive was absolutely beautiful, and the roads were better than Russia. I would share pictures of the drive, but I want to get to the best part of our day---- meeting Dennis!

Here we are in front of the DeitskyDom. We didn't even get a chance to change into nice clothes before going there. We could hardly stand to take this picture knowing that our son was inside the building behind those gates. As we walked onto the orphanage grounds, we immediately saw a handful of young children playing here and there. I instinctively looked for Dennis, but knew that most likely they were preparing him for our introduction.

First thing, we met with the director----- a very nice gentleman who gave us permission to see Dennis after answering a few of his questions. They were good questions like------- what did we do, how many kids do we have, do we know of Dennis's medical conditions. We answered honestly--- from our heart------- and I guess we passed "the test" because we were then invited to go meet our son.

As we walked down the dimlit halls that turned this way and that, I tried to prepare myself to meet Dennis. I was very emotional in a most wonderful way but I didn't want to be too emotional and appear like a basket case in front of everyone. Thankfully, when we got to the room where we were to meet him, he wasn't there just yet and I had a moment to compose myself...... or so I thought. A second later, they allowed Dennis to power himself out out in a cute little baby walker......... and I was overwhelmed with feelings of love and thankfulness that this moment had finally arrived. And you know what......... Dennis in all of his shyness and standoffishness the first few minutes of meeting him---- was absolutely perfect in our eyes. He was so tiny, so innocent, so amazing, and so so scared of us, that I couldn't thank God enough for allowing us to be there at that moment. The tears flowed from my eyes----- but they were tears of absolute joy that this little boy before me was my son to be, now and forever.

It was too emotional a moment to spoil it with getting out the camera and taking a picture though I wish I had now, but none the less these pictures were taken only minutes after meeting him. After a short time, I finally could stand it no longer, and I asked if I could pick Dennis up. He was not immediately responsive to me...... more like a doll in my arms, but his warm body in my arms was such an amazing feeling that I didn't care. I carried him to this playroom where John and I got to spend one on one time with Dennis.

It took a while to get Dennis to warm up to us, but we had all the time in the world. John started juggling some balls and when he dropped one, we got to hear a great attempt at laughing accompanied by a big beautfiul smile. It warmed our hearts and we wished that everyone back home could share this amazing moment with us. Guys, he is such a miracle! We are so blessed. Dennis will win your hearts the second you meet him if he hasn't already. (Can you tell that I am smitten?)

Dennis is like a feather--- very light and dainty. He is so precious that he feels like a piece of fragile China that you can't help but want to hold with the utmost care. The instinct to
protect and love him has already kicked in like God picked him out especially for us and gave me these feelings like one of his precious gifts to me. I know that some of you reading may think I sound crazy, but oh well, then call me crazy.

Dennis through all of his medical diagnoses is one very smart and determined little boy. I have a feeling that nothing is going to stop him from achieving his dreams. He loved looking at our family photo album and actually flipped the pages from front to back and then back to the front. He found that the last page had no picture so therfore, was easy to scrunch up. The crackle sound this made along with John's funny noises entertained Dennis for a very long time. He quickly learned that each time he scrunched up the page he could make his Papa make funny noises. Dennis is such a smart boy.

He started to respond to our touch very quickly, and loved when I breathed heavily on the back of his neck. He wondered who was behind him giving him all this love and attention and touch.

Here are his beautiful, little hands. For those wondering, he has a very sweet heavenly smell that only a baby could have. Yes, he will soon be two years old, but he is very much our little baby.

By the end of our second visit today, Dennis has really warmed up to us. He tracks our voice, has showed us that he cold crawl and walk with assistance, and even felt comfortable enough to crawl over to me and lay his head down in my lap seconds before we got up to leave.

While his medical info has some interesting things in addition to what is obvious to the eye that we did not expect---- like a cleft pallette------ we have already started all the paperwork to make him our son.

Having fun in Kyiv

2008-06-24T22:30:00.000-07:00

A special day deserves a special treat! Soft serve ice-cream...... yum!

We again walked the river strip ---this time in the opposite direction we did yesterday.

Along the way we saw lots of Ukrainian carnival fun. The kids sure looked like they were enjoying themselves.

The beach was full of people today. We are disappointed that we didn't bring our swimsuits.

Many moms were out with their babies. And all of them were oh so cute! It makes us wish that
we had him all the sooner.

Even Dedushkas were out with their grandchildren.

I could imagine this being me and a couple of my friends in 40 or so years. Never too old to chit chat with girl friends.

John and I thought we would save money and eat in. We kind of craved cold milk and cereal and so that is what we bought or so we thought.........

Instead, it was the thickest milk we have ever seen in our lives.

Still, John was game to try------ the brave guy.

But as you can see in this picture--- he regrets it. The sour residue is still in his mouth even as I type this.

Since we were still hungry, we hit the streets again and this time found an awesome grocery store called WestLine. It was very Americanized and even had rotisserie chicken and 10 check out stands that took credit.

We bought: Napoleon (a delicious dessert), piroshki, chicken rice pilaf, cotlieti, kapusta salad, and Coke to wash it down.

It was delicious! Score!

We had one of these for a snack and we loved its funny name. Ice Burger: two words Americans can crave overseas.

Our SDA Appointment!

2008-06-24T15:45:00.000-07:00

Everything is going better than expected at this point in time! Praise God! Other than my grumpiness for lack of sleep yesterday that a nap quickly cured, I couldn't be happier with how things are going.

We did however wake up to find out that there is no hot water in Kyiv right now, but John lovingly heated up some hot water and basically helped me with my shower. It was romantic to say the least. He was a real man though, and opted to take his shower cold. I did give him a final rinse with warm water.

Here are our pictures from the SDA appointment. It went better than I could have ever imagined and we were in and out in less than 20 minutes. We also got a pleasant surprise.......... a baby picture of Dennis! And..... his birthday is two days earlier than we thought so he doesn't share with our daughter Anna afterall! The psychologist promised to give it to us once we brought an updated picture of Dennis back. Woooo-hooo!

Me under the official SDA sign right next to the door leading into the building.

The church right next to the SDA.

We got to our appt. 10 minutes early so we waited here outside the gate.

Here we are standing in the stairwell inside the SDA building.

Late tonight we are heading out to the Donetsk (spelling??) region. Ironically we are going by van......not our Ukraine train like our blog name indicates. However John thinks that we will Ukraine Train back to Kyiv after court. We will travel all night and visit Dennis tomorrow in the orphanage!

I think we are on Ukraine time now, after a long walk at 10 o'clock last night. The river strip that our apartment is located next to was full of night life. Quite the place to hang out if you are in your twenties and like to drink, smoke, and make out. John was all for it..... at least the making out part, ha ha.

More posts to come with lots of pictures!

We've made it to Kyiv!

2008-06-23T20:45:00.000-07:00

Greetings from Kyiv! Praise God we made it safe and sound!

Here is a picture of Ukraine as we are descending to land.

Interesting how you can buy a beer from a vending machine. I wonder how they check the age?

When we got off the plane (about an hour later than expected due to late departure in JFK because they said they wanted to accommodate a group of missionaries) we first needed to head through “pass port control”.

They needed to know where we were staying and we had simply entered “Kyiv” on the paperwork. He, with thick Russian accent said, “Kyiv is a very big city and we need the address”. I said it is some hotel and that I don’t know its address. But, remembering the advice received recently from FRUA, we said it was the “Hotel DNIPRO” and he said very well then write that down, and we did, and we then went to the next step.

Baggage Claim.

This was pretty hilarious. Lots of saran wrap. And are these checked melons? Round and round went the same bags that no one touched unless they were putting them BACK on the track after falling off at every corner!

But after about a half hour, ours sure enough came ‘round and we then went to the next step.
This is the green line of customs declaration where we just simply had to go through a security X-ray screening of our bags again (to leave the airport)?!

Kyiv is beautiful!

This picture was taken from the car window during our drive.

Here is our apartment right on the Dniper River.

Unlike the keys in Ivanovo, Russia which were big and ancient looking, our apartment key looks just like one of our American house keys. You just have to lock the door if you want it to stay
closed.

Our luxurious bathroom!

John and I are pleased to see all kinds of family activity here. This is a playground right on the banks of the river. Most families here have only one or two children with three being unusual, and I think we would stick out like a sore thumb if we would have brought all of our kids.
BTW, hi kids!

Funny how this river freezes three feet thick in winter but is 80 degrees right now!

This is a beautiful church being refurbished with ornate gold tops. To us, this was a wonderful sight to see but at the same time I can't help but wonder if the magnificent church actually deters people from coming because one can feel unworthy even walking into it. I think that if the church resembled more of an outdoor revival camp, it might attract more people.

These hardworking men were drilling for water on the church grounds.

Here are those gold tops I was telling you about.

We went to a fancy coffee/sushi shop and had very expensive coffee (worst $8 bucks I've ever spent if you don't count the experience). The check came in this. Very unusual.

We tried a restaurant that supposedly has WiFi and ordered this dessert to eat while we waited. It was filled with pears, pine nuts and apples. It was yummy but again, too expensive for my blood. We are having cup of noodles from home tonight for dinner. Sadly, they had no Internet connection either.

This is our apartment building. We are on the first floor.

We took this gorgeous (not) picture of us in front of the Dniper River. Doesn't it look picturesque?

Not from this picture.

We've walked along this strip many times today just people watching and looking at all the buildings.

This was fancy restaurant next to EKO which is the grocery store. John had to wait outside because we didn't want to put all of our computer stuff in a locker.

Here is another restaurant front. Very, very pretty.

These boys parked their bikes so that they could chase stray cats.

BTW, Tomorrow afternoon is our SDA appointment.

We made it to JFK!

2008-06-22T06:50:00.000-07:00

First off, today is John's birthday! Happy, happy birthday honey! You don't look a day over 39!

This is all the luggage we have. In case we get to bring home Dennis this trip, we didn't want to have too much luggage. Back when we adopted Anna and Sveta in Sept 2005, we took the max luggage allowed and had a heck of a time hauling it out of the airport. Miss Anna had decided to refuse to help us carry luggage and our then scared little girl acted like she would run off so John had to carry her too on top of our four suitcases and two carry ons. You can say we learned our lesson, and packed lighter this time.

As a birthday dinner in LAX, John chose to eat at El Cholo's (only option over pizza). While waiting for our food to come we saw a lady not more than 50 feet from us holding her son up to a trash can so he could pee in it. It was so obvious........ and disgusting. Can't you tell by John's expression? I know, we should have taken a picture of the mom and son.

We managed to still enjoy our yummy chicken tortilla soup and chewy chile verde.

Here is John walking to our international terminal in humid, sticky New York.

And here I am blogging to all of you! Internet access for 6 hours. Best nine bucks I've ever spent. Just kidding.

Hi kids! We love you! Thanks for the comments!

Leaving Tomorrow!

2008-06-20T20:44:00.000-07:00

We are all set! Ukraine here we come!

Today my mom and sister came to help me with last minute preparations and to visit before we leave tomorrow. They also watched the kids so that I can go and run the last of my errands. I got everything done, Praise the Lord and I feel good about leaving tomorrow.

Again, I just have to say how blessed we are that the donations still keep coming in--- two hundred dollars just today. I am amazed how the Lord continues to provide even when I am too busy to try to fund raise on my own anymore. I guess that it was Him doing the work in the first place and I was just making it my own business because I thought He couldn't do a good enough job on his own. Shame on me... what was I thinking? Well, I am here to tell you that the Lord does provide and a million thank yous go out to each and everyone of you that have given so freely of your money and prayers. I am humbled and more appreciative than you guys will ever know.

I am excited that soon Dennis will be in our arms but I have been advised not to post pictures until after court. :( This will my biggest challenge probably yet..... the temptation alone might get the best of me, but don't worry, I will post and throw in some pictures anyways.

While we are gone, please, please, please leave comments, even if you haven't before. Adam, Rachel, Caleb, Sveta, Annalyn, Julia, Anna, William, Andrew, and Jonny -- that includes you too! I already know that I will appreciate it very much! And I know they'll help me to not feel so far away.

God Bless all of you!

Leaving in 2 days!

2008-06-19T22:15:00.000-07:00

Isn't that just amazing? As I am tying up loose ends here and there, I feel so thankful for our family and friends that have rallied around us to help make this adoption possible. As I sat with my good friend Denise who will be watching the kids while we are gone, I felt a sense of peace come over me knowing that my children and home will be in good hands. My Mom, John's parents, my cousin, and my Aunt Tanya have all offered to come and help whenever they can too. Truly, it is a blessing. Thank you to all of you ahead of time.

Almost everything is packed, and I've ran 90% of my errands with little left to do now before we leave on Saturday. My biggest concern is being able to get in touch with family while we are in Ukraine. My stateside coordinator says that if that is my biggest concern than I am doing pretty good. I think I might be feeling different come Saturday morning....don't you think? :)

Just for him

2008-06-18T16:18:00.000-07:00

Just a couple of little things I am bringing with us for little Dennis. Do you think he will like them? Do you think our little 21 month old will fit into a size 5-6 shoe? If not, he'll grow into them!

I can't sleep

2008-06-18T00:50:00.000-07:00

Here it is almost 1am. and I am still awake. I just can't sleep. Is that normal? I'm sure it is normal, but I find myself filled with all the excitement of a first time parent, and it has got me racing with thoughts nonstop. I have to remind myself that I am only going to Ukraine to adopt a little boy, but then I think, "I AM GOING TO UKRAINE TO ADOPT MY LITTLE BOY!"

It is finally happening, God is in control, and I need to remember that in all that I do. He has been with me in more ways than I can count, even when I have yelled at my kids, failed again to open my bible for over three days, or barked at my husband to do this or do that in preparation for our trip. Seems silly, but in all God's grace, he even kept my windshield free from bug guts as I ran more errands today with all 10 kids in tow. Remember, I had it washed yesterday, only the third time this year, and I would love for it to stay clean until friends and family use it.

I've made a photo album, packed most of our stuff, visited a second bank to get the newest looking bills I could find, and even managed to spend quality time swimming and going for a walk with my kids. Praise God. Not to brag, but I've even managed to drop 7 pounds since I found out we were leaving.... and we aren't even in Ukraine yet. I guess having less than three weeks notice and preparing to leave a family of 10 behind while you travel to a different country will do that to you.

I've started having vivid dreams about Dennis........ the first time meeting him and smelling his sweet skin as I hold him close for the first time, watching him play with his brothers, watching his excitement because of our dog Dolly. All these dreams are so good but are often followed with me waking up late on the day we are to leave. Argh! I hate it when that happens. I probably keep waking up like that because I don't have a watch that works. I should probably go and buy one between now and Saturday.

Anyway, I am finally getting tired. Probably from all that rambling I just did. (I think I used the P word probably three times in the last three sentences.)

Good night.

Won't be Empty for Long

2008-06-16T21:53:00.000-07:00

Only five days left till we leave! I am starting to get really excited! Hallelujah! Dennis here we come!

Here is all of the luggage we are taking and I need to make all of our stuff fit inside these two suitcases and two carry-ons. Can I do it?

On another note, everything is falling into place. I ran a bunch of errands today and even had the car washed for whoever drives it while we are gone. Believe me, my van so needed a good cleaning.

Donations are still trickling in, Praise God, and He has provided us with the funds to make this adoption happen! However, Erin never emailed me to claim her Moscow mug. What should I do? Erin, if you are reading, please email me your address.

Sorry this is so short, but I am off to fill up those suitcases!

Getting things done

2008-06-13T23:38:00.000-07:00

Only 8 days till we leave. I know that, and I am preparing for our departure, but I still need the occasional pinch to know that I am not dreaming. I'm not dreaming, right? :)

I have taken my deep breath and am finally over the shock, and now things are actually getting done. I've picked up our tickets, I've prepaid our bills, and I've cooked up a few casseroles so that my friend Denise doesn't have to worry about all the meals when we are gone.

I got lots of help from my girls too.

Here is Russian Cotlyeti.

Chicken pasta, and chicken enchiladas.

And Beef enchilada casserole with red sauce.

And another wonderful thing is that we have received another $250 in donations. Thank you. I can't say that enough, really. I am humbled by your generosity. Your giving hearts shine through and I just need to tell you that I appreciate how supportive all of you have been.

Everything is happening according to His plan, and I get to watch it all unfold. I hope I don't leave out to many details, so that you can feel like you are watching too!

Dennis, my sweet baby boy, only a few more days and I'll be holding you in my arms!

And the Moscow Starbucks Mug goes to.....

2008-06-12T20:52:00.000-07:00

Erin Mitchell! Congratulations! Please email me with your address. Thanks to all of you who donated money for a raffle ticket.

Countdown-- 10 days till we board the Train (I mean plane)

2008-06-11T12:58:00.000-07:00

Time is flying! Only 10 days left until John and I say goodbye to our 10 children and drive down to LAX. It is a bittersweet thought. Sure I will miss my kids, and I will probably wonder constantly how they are all faring, but as John puts it, in a way, this is a vacation away from the kids. Is that bad?

I am more calm as of now, and I am not sure that is good because I feel like I am getting nothing accomplished. I mean after all, we do have 10 days before we leave and that's plenty of time, right?

I guess maybe I just don't know where to start. I have written the note that allows my friend to seek medical attention for the kids, and I have bought the food and 30 foil casserole dishes to make up some freezer meals for my family to eat while we are gone. But what next? Pack? Buy gifts? Print pictures? What exactly should I be packing in my carry on? What kinds of foods/snacks should I take? What should I pack for Dennis? What kinds of things will they let us do with him? I am packing the frog, some bubbles, a blow up ball, a picture book, but what else?

I am sure looking forward to your comments/advice on this post.

Oh and by the way, the raffle ends tomorrow and I will be drawing a name around 7pm PST. So get a ticket if you would like a chance to win the mug. It is not to late. A few of you tried to use RME and it never worked. Please email if you are still interested in participating in the raffle or if you know that RME didn't work for you. Thank you so much.

God showed me

2008-06-09T22:14:00.000-07:00

Admittedly, the past couple of days have been really challenging for me. Ever since I bought our tickets on Friday I have felt uneasy about it. All weekend my mind raced with thoughts about this adoption. We celebrated one of our daughters birthday on Saturday, and I felt bad because my mind wasn't completely focused on her.

First off, our tickets cost more than we were originally quoted thanks to Aeroflot adding on a commission. Secondly, our tickets had a layover in Moscow, Russia which has two airports with the same name--- SVO1 and SVO2. I could not get in writing that we did not have to change airports and when I found out that there was a new terminal C, I about lost all confidence that I had booked us good flights. I was nervous. My nervousness fed my other concerns and soon I was worrying about all kinds of things again. God, will we have all the money by the time that we leave? I haven't even began packing yet. I haven't bought any gifts yet. I haven't made a picture book of our family. Blah, blah, blah, blah. At this point I knew I should dive into the word. I knew it. My heart knew it. My mind knew it. But I didn't make time for God, and I suffered all weekend.

To make a long story short, by this morning, my birthday, I was starting to feel sick to my stomach. And selfishly, I headed over to my computer to read my email instead of opening the bible and spending time with God. If I were God, I probably would have made the Internet not work this morning, but instead I opened my email to find a note from Reece's Rainbow saying that someone or many persons had donated over $500.00 overnight. Tears started flowing down my cheeks. God is so faithful folks. I am here to tell you that. Even when we are so unworthy, God is ready to pour on His grace. Thank you God.

After seeing that email, I finally got off the computer and went up to my room to get my bible. I opened it up and found an old post-it note with the verse Psalms 143:7 I was flabbergasted.

Psalm 143:7 (NIV) Answer me quickly, O LORD; my spirit fails. Do not hide your face from me or I will be like those who go down to the pit.

I couldn't believe it. And I couldn't believe it when the phone rang about ten minutes later as I was finishing up praying and it was my travel agent saying that she got my message about canceling our flight and finding a better one. She said that she found great seats on Delta with one layover at JFK. The times were perfect, and so was the price. Praise God. I thought to myself, "How'd you do that?"

And literally minutes later, John called me to say that we are one step closer to having our tax return back in time to use it for the adoption. Woo-hooooo! It was just so evident that God was telling me yet again,

"Christine, calm down. Take a deep breath. Relax. I am here. I am here for you. Aren't I always? When do I fail you? I love you. Please remember to come to me with your troubles. Do not worry about your adoption. You are doing what I called you to do. I will provide for your needs. Don't I always? I love you, Christine. Do not worry. "

By the end of the day, God showed himself to me time and time again. Things that were troubling me but had kind of taken a back seat have been resolved. Thank you God. God is clearing the path for me to focus on more important things, like getting our son, by freeing up my time to focus on Him more. Make sense?

To top off the day, I have to share that a very special letter came in the mail today. Nothing else---just this letter..... and a check. The letter was from one of my sisters in Christ that want to remain anonymous. I completely respect that. You know who you are and I thank you so much for the love offering to bring Dennis home. Your letter couldn't have come on a more poignant day.

We leave on John's birthday!

2008-06-07T00:29:00.000-07:00

I've booked our flights! We will be riding Delta, Aeroflot, and Co Donbassaero. Definitely a leap of faith I feel at this point. God, please get us there in one piece! Did I mention that I am afraid of flying?

Only 17 days to go

2008-06-05T23:05:00.000-07:00

Okay guys, I can finally breathe. The shock has worn off. We are going to Ukraine in less than 17 days and that is that. I will book our tickets tomorrow, have put in a request for brand new money through our bank, and have lined up childcare for all 10 kids. My awesome and dear friend is going to move into our home with her three kids while we are gone. Hopefully her husband will too. My nesting is in full force, and before I know it I will be changing diapers again. Life is good.

Thanks to all that have bought raffle tickets thus far. 28 are going into a hat so far. Pretty amazing, huh? I am so thankful for all of your generosity and support. I wish all of you could win! The only thing I could think of would be to break the mug and send each of you that bought a ticket a piece of the mug. Hee, hee. Aren't I funny?

Don't worry, I'm sure the mug is coming in one piece.

The raffle is going on until June 12, so if you are thinking of getting a raffle ticket it is not too late.
And for all of you RMEr's, thanks for signing up. Seven of you guys did! I have also noticed some are having trouble with RME and I wanted to suggest signing up first and then trying to use the account. It might make things easier.

It is really happening!

2008-06-04T10:53:00.001-07:00

You know how you wait for so long for the moment to finally come when you hear, "It is time to go get your child?" Well, if your like me you have probably been longing for the day, and for us, Thank God the day came yesterday. But now my impatience has turned into panic/craziness/feeling overwhelmed/scatterbrained/unfocused. Honestly, I think the waiting might have been easier. LOL. Anyway, I am trusting for God to not stop now as he continues to lead us down this path, but boy, do I have to stop and remind myself numerous times a day that He is still the one in control.

I have to remember that He will still provide. With things now going full speed, I often find myself questioning him. Lord, how are we going to find good tickets in such short notice? Will they give us Dennis' referral? Will I be able to handle being away from my kids for so long? What about all of the adoption costs? I thought we had more time to come up with all of the funds. Just the other day, I received a comment that basically told us that if we fund raised or asked for donations we shouldn't be adopting in the first place. This can't be true, can it? I mean, we have the money to raise Dennis, and seek medical attention for him, but pulling $20 grand out of a hat is a bit challenging for us, I admit. Plus, I honestly believe that for some, it is a blessing for them to be able to help a family who wants to open their home to a child through adoption. At least it has been for us at other times in our lives.

Honestly, I am making a fresh commitment to my Lord today. No more doubting. He is in control, he has answered our prayers numerous times throughout our journey thus far, and He is not going to stop now. I don't expect other people to get it, like this one anonymous commenter, but I know that those of you that I consider my friends, do. May God bless you for that as you have blessed me.

I can't believe it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2008-06-03T11:24:00.000-07:00

We have to be in Ukraine on Monday, June 23! Our SDA appt is on Tuesday, June 24!!!!!!!!!!! Less than 3 weeks away. Boy, am I in complete shock, but oh, how I am praising God!

Dennis here we come!!!!!!!!!!

Enter to win a Moscow Starbucks mug!

2008-06-01T11:19:00.000-07:00

I am doing my very first raffle in hopes to raise money towards Dennis' adoption. My wonderful blogging friend over at American Girls in Moscow has donated this awesome Starbucks mug. Isn't it wonderful? Thank you Tamara!

The contributions given for an entry ticket to the raffle will go towards Dennis' orphanage donation that is customary for all adopting parents to give . You can enter more than once and buy a ticket via Revolution Money Exchange (no fees unlike Paypal) or via mail. You can find the buy me link on the side bar. Just email if you would like our address.

Please consider buying a ticket for $2.50. What other way are you going to get an authentic, Starbucks mug from Moscow, Russia? :)

The raffle will be ending on June 12 and the item will be shipped to the winner at the end of the month when Tamara will be coming to the US for a visit. She has promised to include some literature written in Russian. You probably won't be able to read it, but at least when you drink your first cup of tea or coffee you can pull it out and read it and feel like you are in the Starbucks in Russia. Pretty cool, huh?

I thank you

2008-05-29T15:29:00.000-07:00

Someone just signed up for Revolution Money Exchange. That is $10 more towards Dennis' adoption. I wish I knew who you were so that I could thank you personally. RME doesn't tell me who signed up just like Reece's Rainbow doesn't tell me who has donated. But I want you to know that every little bit has been noticed and is much appreciated.

Just so you know, if you have a blog you can put a link button on your page and now you will get $10 for everyone that signs up through you. You can use the money earned towards your own adoption or use the money to donate to your favorite charity or just keep the money and treat yourself to a movie.

Again, please know how thankful I am. Your generosity continues to confirm that God will provide...... he does provide. Whether the money is coming from our tax return, our savings, generous givers such as yourself, and or our own setting aside of money each month, the Lord is providing. The funds are being gathered for His glory, to bring one amazing little boy home.

As I try to understand how God provides, I am reminded that sometimes He uses us as His vessels that enable Him to do great things through us. I think that is what shining our lights is all about.

Matthew 25:40 (NIV)
"The King will reply, 'I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me.'"

Huge Blessings

2008-05-28T19:58:00.000-07:00

You guys are so amazing! Two more people signed up for Revolution Money Exchange and we earned $20.00 for that, and then I am not certain but it looks like someone made a $50.00 donation through Reece's Rainbow. I am blown away that donations keep coming in. May God bless you guys. Thank you so much.

I am hoping to get a raffle started by the end of this week and so please make sure to check back in the next day or two.

Decisions, decisions

2008-05-26T20:19:00.000-07:00

As the time to get Dennis is getting closer I have all kinds of thoughts running through my head. He will be around 2 years old when we bring him home.... an official toddler but not too big to be treated like a baby if you know what I mean. Besides, he can use some babying, can't he? There is no way he is going to get away with not cuddling, snuggling, tickling, cozying, and kissing before I let him officially move on to toddlerhood.

So.... if you were me would you just let him stay in diapers for another year? Put him in crib or let him sleep with his new brother like I did with all the other kids at that age? Let him drink a bottle and be hand fed or move on to a sippy cup and the road of independence?

I have also had a few moments where I've worried that maybe we won't be able to handle Dennis' needs. What if we make a poor decision on his behalf when it comes time for him to have surgery, and he has to live with it for the rest of his life? I am trusting God to walk us through these times or else he wouldn't have laid Dennis on our hearts in the first place, right?

So there you go. Now you know that I am an emotional Mama to be, and I don't even have any pregnancy hormones to deal with. You would think that after so many kids, I would have this "about to become a mama again" thing down. Ha, who says?

Too late

2008-05-23T20:08:00.001-07:00

I first want to say thanks to you know who for signing up for Revolution Money Exchange. She just earned us $10.00 that is already in our account. Thank you. Sadly though, she did not get the $25 because today they stopped that promo. What is really awesome is that she knew that she would not get the $25, yet she still signed up. What a friend. She was also nice enough to let me know so that I can in turn inform all of you just in case you were planning on signing up. It still is a great way to exchange money instead of Paypal if you are interested in signing up.

Please get the $25 for free!

2008-05-23T15:35:00.000-07:00

Hi Everyone! I am very excited to have found an awesome way for us to raise money for our adoption. And it is so easy and free! Can you believe it? I was quite skeptical at first, but after watching this on other people's blogs and finally signing up myself, I can say that it is legit. It is called Revolution Money Exchange.

It is a lot like Paypal, probably Paypal's up and coming rival, except that it is free. That means there are no fees. Plus you get $25 just for signing up and then $10 for everyone that clicks on your link and signs up under you. I have already earned $25 towards our adoption just for signing up, and I am asking that everyone who reads this to please consider signing up too. Remember, you will get $25 just for signing up and we will get an additional $10 because you signed up under us. Plus you will be able to exchange money without any fees with anybody else who uses Revolution Money Exchange.

The process takes only a couple of minutes and then about two days to verify the account that you want the free $25 deposited into.

Again, please consider this easy way to help us raise money for Dennis' adoption. I am also going to be starting a raffle in the next day or two that you may want to participate in and this will be an easy way to buy a ticket.

Thank you, thank you, thank you, ahead of time.

Just click here to sign up. :)

Praise the Lord!

2008-05-23T12:53:00.000-07:00

God is so faithful! Not only did we get submitted this week, but donations keep coming in. Just in the past two or so days, we have gotten $60.00 in donations. I don't know specifically who you are, but thank you! Every little bit counts. No amount is too little. God recognizes it all...... and it all is for His glory.

Yes, Dennis will soon become our son, but in reality we are just being entrusted by God to look after his child. What a privilege. And to know that all of you are helping to bring Dennis home is such a beautiful thing to witness. Thank you again........ and not only for your donations but for all of your prayers. Prayers to bring him home. Prayers that he is not in pain. Prayers that the doctors will have wisdom to best help Dennis so that he can have the self esteem when he looks in the mirror that all of us, including myself, take for granted.

All of you, thanks for your continued support.

So what does submitted mean?

2008-05-20T21:37:00.000-07:00

Yesterdays news means that the SDA (State Department on Adoption and Children's Rights) has accepted our dossier (adoption paperwork) to adopt from Ukraine. Now we have about 20 business days to wait and see if they accept or reject it. I am not too worried about them rejecting it because it had been looked over before it was submitted and all of our documents still have 6+ months on them. So........... in twenty days or so we should get our invitation to travel with a specific appointment date to hopefully be referred our known child--- Dennis.

At this point, I am very hopeful that he will indeed be home before his 2nd birthday now. Wouldn't that be totally awesome? I just have to keep praying. I just have to remain faithful that God will continue to work miracles on Dennis' behalf. Will you please continue to pray for little Dennis too?

I also want to take a moment and say thank you to all that have recently given to Dennis' adoption fund. We are now at $1730.00. Praise God! Isn't that fantastic? Thank you God for touching the hearts of those around us and those that have only gotten to know us through our blog. It is hard to understand how complete strangers would want to help us. By the end of it, I hope we are no longer strangers. May You bless them as they have blessed us.

This past Saturday, our church mother's group had a family picnic. To my surprise they honored my hard work and dedication for helping to start the successful mother's group over 11 years ago. It was a very special time, and I am in awe of how wonderful my church family and friends are. What made it so special was that they took up a love offering from the group and presented us with nearly $200.00 to go towards our adoption costs.

Thank you to all of the moms of MUGS (Mothers Under Grace). You guys come together to support and uplift your fellow sisters in Christ like no other group that I know. You guys rock!

As I digest all the prayers and donations that have been done on our behalf, James 1:27 pops into my mind. "Pure and genuine religion in the sight of God the Father means caring for orphans and widows in their distress and refusing to let the world corrupt you."

After this incredible week how can I worry about how the rest of our adoption is going to go? I trust that I will have Dennis in my arms very soon. And as we get closer to traveling and having to actually hand over the biggest portion of our adoption costs for facilitation fees, travel, orphanage donation, and living expenses, I have Faith that God will provide. Every week we are getting closer to having the money we need to complete this adoption. Hopefully, next week we will have our stimulus check.... and boy will that get us even closer!

Thank you again for your giving hearts.

Exciting News!

2008-05-19T08:48:00.001-07:00

I got the call!

We have been submitted!

Praise God!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Thank you for all of your prayers!

Red Letters Campaign

2008-05-18T20:57:00.000-07:00

A fellow blogger, Brandi shared with me all about Red Letters Campaign and what they stand for. If you are interested in living faith to end poverty then please check out the website. If you support what they are doing and have a blog, then please sign up to be a blog buddy. Thanks!

20 months old

2008-05-16T15:46:00.000-07:00

Dennis is 20 months old today. I wonder how his day is going? I'm sending out prayers to all of our children waiting in orphanages for us to bring them home. I wonder if he will be home in time to celebrate his 2nd birthday with us.

Also, thank you to the wonderful and giving person who sent a check in the mail to help with Dennis' adoption. I am humbled at your desire to share in the blessing of bringing him home. Thank you from the bottom of my heart. At a time when I am admittedly filled with some doubt and disappointment that nothing has happened with our adoption, God comes through and uses one of his people to lift my spirits and reaffirm what we are doing, just when I need it most. God bless you.

Doesn't he?

2008-05-14T08:17:00.000-07:00

Happy Mother's Day

2008-05-11T22:08:00.000-07:00

Today is a day that we give tribute to all of the wonderful mothers out there. I think that all of you are amazing. And for those women that are waiting to become a mom, I thank you for enduring the long process that we call international adoption. When you meet your child for the first time, you will see just how worth the wait was.

I hope all of you had a special day. God Bless.

A baby chick named Dennis

2008-05-07T16:31:00.000-07:00

This conversation brought me to tears.

"Mama, look what I made at preschool today. It is three cheekens."

"Jonny, they sure are three chickens and I love them. You did a great job."

"Mmm,hmmm," Jonny nodded. "Do you know who they are?"

"Yes. They are Mama, Papa, and Jonny, right?" I asked as I pointed to each one.

"Noooooooooo, that is wrong Mama. That one is Daddy. That one is you. And the baby chick is Dennis."
******************************
For some reason, I was not expecting him to say that.

Hanging in There

2008-05-06T22:19:00.000-07:00

I'm still hanging in there. No news, yet. I find myself thinking of Dennis often, but at the same time I have my other kids to keep me busy. Life just keeps going. Every day that passes, I think that it is one more day that Dennis has missed being part of a family. I keep praying that he doesn't miss too many more.

Look, a present for you

2008-05-03T22:08:00.000-07:00

"Dennis you got a present the other day. A sweet friend of mine named Kristen gave this to me when I went to MUGS (local mother's group that stands for Mothers Under Grace). She hopes this will get you home sooner. So do I. How can you stay over in Ukraine if you have presents waiting to be opened here at your new home? Besides, if you don't come home soon, you might outgrow it."

Yes, we are healthy..... for the second time

2008-04-29T20:44:00.000-07:00

More documents are on their way to Ukraine tonight. Though it is a royal pain to have to redo docs, I am grateful that the Secretary of State is only 35 minutes away. I hate to think how painful it would be if we lived hours away from the place that gives our paperwork their magical appeal. What is so special about that golden apostille seal anyway?

Ukraine Holidays

2008-04-27T19:32:00.000-07:00

Another week is about to start. I'm ready. Bring it on. However, tomorrow I can't expect anything because I guess Ukraine is celebrating Easter this weekend and Monday is an official holiday. I truly hope they have a wonderful weekend celebration and Tuesday brings changed and refreshed hearts about the way current adoptions are happening.

I think of Dennis often and wonder how long if ever it will be until we get to hold him in our arms. I often think about his eye and whether or not it brings him discomfort. From a close-up picture it looks as if he has continual conjunctivitis and I wonder if anyone cares to clean it and ease the irritation.

When I was giving my three youngest boys their baths last night, I realized just how much I am able to care for them and show them my love. I help wash them up in the bath. I clean their ears, cut their nails, comb their hair, help them get dressed. It is a common routine that I can do with my eyes closed. Sure, it can be an inconvenience when I have other things I need to do, but oh what I wouldn't do to have the inconvenience of bathing my little Dennis, and cleaning his ears, and putting on his pajamas.

In case some of you are new to my blog and didn't get the chance to see a picture of our little guy, you can click on the donation link on the right side of our blog. Thanks for visiting.

100th Post and I've been Tagged!

2008-04-26T21:42:00.000-07:00

What do you know, this blog has reached it's 100th post! How cool! I should have baked a cake or something for dessert to celebrate. Ahhh, maybe when I make my 200th post, I 'll throw a party or something. By that time I hope Dennis will be home and then we'll really have something to celebrate.

I'm sure that Joy knew this was my 100th post :) because she tagged me. So here are 6 unusual things about me.

1. I sometimes pretend to be a bus driver when I am driving my 15 passenger van. It is a job I think that I would really enjoy.

2. I dance and sing around my kids all the time. And my songs make no sense. Neither do my dances.

3. I am spoiled by my daughter Sveta. Almost every night, she brushes my hair. As long as I continue to make oooh and ahh sounds to show her how nice it feels when she brushes my hair she will continue to do it until she tells me that her arm is tired. "Mom, I stop brushing your hair now because my arms is tired. Tomorrow I will come and do it again okay?" "Okay, Sveta. Thank you so much. You almost make me want to fall asleep now." "I know Mama, I brush your hair so good."

4. To pass the time when I am in the waiting room at Caleb's orthodontist appointment, I clean my purse out. I pile everything in the chair next to me and sort through my receipts. I always manage to entertain at least a couple of people.

5. I still wear a night gown that I got at my bridal shower over 14 years ago. It isn't even my size, and I don't even really like it very much, but I am too cheap to replace it. I just don't buy things for myself very much. The reason it isn't my size is because the person who bought it for me thought I was still very heavy. She had also gotten me the biggest grandma underwear you have ever seen, but I got rid of those when I could no longer have children. The underwear were quite embarrassing but they made great maternity panties. Little did she know that I went through a crazy partying stage of my life and dropped 50 pounds. I think the nightgown is an extra large and I wear a medium.

6. If I told you about my life 15 years ago, you probably wouldn't believe me. Heck, even I have a hard time believing that I was who I was back then prior to having God in my life.

I tag anybody who wants to play this game. :)

Back to Paper Chasing

2008-04-25T20:31:00.000-07:00

Our medicals have been redone. Looks like I will be notarizing and apostilling them this coming Tuesday. Let the paperchase begin again!

I wonder if all countries make adoptive families continually update their documents? I know Russia does, but that is after a full year. But what about Haiti, China, Africa, Estonia, or Kazakhstan?

I wonder if I could buy stock in the company that makes the nice shiny apostille seals?

Oh, and please continue praying for Dennis to join our family.

Videos

2008-04-24T08:34:00.000-07:00

Wow- two posts in one day! I just wanted to post some of my favorite videos about adoption and street children. I can't imagine not having your heart stirred after watching them. My own heart breaks for these children each and every time I watch these videos. Keep them all in your prayers.

1. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=02qeMXm3JD0

2. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IHiUpxix8jA

3. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=reTJ_28J6K0&feature=related

4. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gg0UOvjbOT0

5. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vxtL3S2o5sY

6. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2Cr6Q5zOkYQ

7. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-YjBMnR1aOk&feature=related

Please leave a comment to share which video touched you most, if any at all.

Time to update

2008-04-24T08:28:00.000-07:00

Still waiting. The time has come to start redoing documents so that they don't expire. Ugggghhhh. This part makes no sense to me. Nothing has changed. I guess they want to make sure that adoptive parents don't get bored during our long wait. How thoughtful of them.

I have to keep reminding myself that God is in control. "God, I'm waiting for you to please move that mountain."

Another week

2008-04-20T20:33:00.000-07:00

We had a good weekend. How about you? Tomorrow is Monday and unlike most people I look forward to it for one reason. I look forward to the new week because then it is possible for us to get adoption news. Nothing happens on the weekend. Now we have the next five days available to receive good news! I am so ready! Aren't you?

6 Months Along

2008-04-16T22:20:00.000-07:00

I am almost six months along. I have only gained 10 pounds so far (pretty good, huh?) I crave anything chocolate. We are having a boy!

I hope God remembers that I am a human, not an elephant. :)

How far along are you?

Have faith, have hope

2008-04-15T21:14:00.000-07:00

Remember, the Lord is faithful. If he can move mountains, he can make things move in Ukraine. :)

For all of those that are waiting to submit your dossier or receive an appointment, don't lose hope. For all those that are adopting from other countries, I will also continue to pray that your children come home soon.

Good night my sweet Dennis.

Dennis is 18 months old

2008-04-14T23:35:00.001-07:00

I have faith that things are happening in Ukraine. I am hopeful that we will hear some good news soon. I am holding on to God's promises still.

Dennis is now a little over eighteen months old. What an awesome age, and we are missing it. On one hand, I hope that he is walking and talking and doing all that toddlers do at this age, but on the other hand, I don't mind if he isn't because then that means that we may get the chance to watch him do these things for the very first time.

Either way, we want to get over to him as soon as we can!

Friends and Family

2008-04-13T16:41:00.000-07:00

When John and I announced that we were adopting again, we knew that we wouldn't get as much enthusiasm from friends and family than if we were announcing our first child. Sad, but true...... the novelty wears off for most people after the first couple of kids and the news of an 11th child can certainly catch anyone off guard. John and I expected that, and so we were pleasantly surprised when friends and family expressed their support or at least refrained from saying anything negative.

I bring this up because I know that other people have dealt with the same issues with their family and friends. It can be very tough to get out your initial adoption news. Figuring out how you are going to tell people and how you are going to respond to their negative comments can be more stressful than the adoption itself. I know......I've been there.

But, I wanted to encourage you that your loved ones can and may just surprise you. I know my Mom did. Bless her heart. Of all people, I thought that she would have the hardest time with our decision to adopt another child, and yet she has ceased to amaze me with her genuine concern for how things are going. A week doesn't go by without her asking how things are going and if we are any closer to traveling. And to top it all off, my mom goes and does something absolutely crazy yet wonderful and selfless. She gave us a big donation to help us bring home Dennis.

Thank you Mom, from the bottom of my heart. Your act of giving us money to help cover the adoption expenses means so much to me. Not because of the money, but more because of what the money represents. To me, the money is a tangible representation of your support for us and our family. To me, it shows that you are investing in your future grandchild, my son, even before you have met him. To me, it means that you are willing to do without something so that one of God's children can have. That is so powerful Mom, and I appreciate it so much. It means so much to me to know that you fully support what I am doing. Now as a grown woman, it has also helped me to recognize the love you had for me even when you let me know that you didn't fully support what I was doing (when I was younger).

The support that we have received ever since we committed to adopt Dennis has confirmed over and over that this is God's plan for our family. Friends and Family please feel our deepest gratitude for all of your prayers, donations, and encouraging words.

Also, thank you to a certain blog friend who sent us the nicest card. Inside was a very gracious donation. You are so right---- the Lord provides. Hopefully, we will be able to show our support for the two of you someday soon in your own adoption journey.

Pray Continually

2008-04-11T12:22:00.000-07:00

GOD IS IN CONTROL! I believe this to be true. I have faith. My hope is stronger than ever. I read this somewhere (not sure where) and was so encouraged by it that I wanted to share with you guys.

Faith is not believing that God can. It is knowing that God will.

And I know that God is going to be faithful to me, and to Dennis as we wait patiently for our time to come to travel to meet our son for the first time.

Today I apostilled two more documents---- a petition to adopt Denis and a letter from the doctor that we are hoping will do all of Dennis' surgeries once he is home. In the beginning I was certain that I would be very bitter if I was asked to do more documents, but I know that is not what God wants from me. 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18 says "Be joyful always; pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus."

So I excitedly ran all of my errands, imagining how much closer we were getting to the day that we will travel.

Lord, I am faithful that you will unite Dennis with us. I am not sure sure when, but I will sit here patiently and expectantly unless I am told to do something different by You.

I will continue to pray and abide in you daily. Please let the day that I meet Dennis face to face be very soon.

I am also very thankful that we have been blesed with $780.00 in donations. Thank you for taking part in making Dennis a part of our family.

God's Promises

2008-04-08T13:57:00.001-07:00

At this moment in our adoption, all I can do is pray. Pray, pray, pray. And what do you know, my small women's group has been doing a book study on how to pray. What perfect timing. Praise God.

In a time with so much uncertainty, all I can do is turn to my Heavenly Father for support, encouragement, and comfort. And I have seeked Him out through His word more times in these past two weeks than I have probably done in the last year. And I am more at peace with our adoption right now because I know His promises.

In my small group I have been learning what it means to abide in God. It means to spend time with him, quality time, and by abiding in Him, I will learn what it is that He wants for my life. I have been using my concordance to find verses that declare God's promises for our lives and I have been so encouraged by His love for me that I have faith that he will answer my prayers.

I want to share with you these amazing verses that I have turned to every morning for the past two weeks. And the constant reminder of His word has driven out the doubt and the nonsense that has caused me to worry and fear that our child may never come home.

Two weeks ago I was led to this verse when I first really started to have doubts.
Psalms 6:9 says, "The Lord has heard my cry for mercy; the Lord accepts my prayer."
When I read and claimed it, I was comforted to know that God not only hears my prayers about Dennis, our dossier, our appointment...... but He also accepts my prayers. So my prayers for little Dennis to come home have been heard.

I was further encouraged to find this verse from Lamentations 3:25 "The Lord is good to those whose hope is in Him; to the one who seeks Him." And not only am I a seeker, but I am a hopeful seeker who I know God is good too. Though I already knew this, I found great comfort in being able to find this verse that helps remind me of it day in and day out.

What is so awesome about God is that He speaks to people differently, through different verses, and what verses He may lead me to today may be different than where He leads you. I am certain that you will find comfort in the verses that He leads you to. Though this may seem like a strange verse to find comfort in, it brings me confirmation that when I believe that God can do
something, He will do it. Matthew 9:27 -30 says, "As Jesus went on from there, two blind men followed him, calling out, "Have mercy on us, Son of David!" When he had gone indoors, the blind men came to him and he asked them, "Do you believe that I am able to do this?" "Yes, Lord," they replied. Then he touched their eyes and said, "According to your faith will it be done to you," and their sight was restored."

Hallelujah! How comforting is that? I keep reading this verse over and over. If these guys believed that He could heal their blindness so that they can see, I can surely believe that God can get our dossier submitted soon.

I was lead to another powerful verse that spoke straight to me as I tried to find verses about God's answer to prayer. I was lead to verse Mark 11:22- 24. "Have faith in God," Jesus answered. "I tell you the truth, if anyone says to this mountain, 'Go throw yourself into the sea,' and does not doubt in his heart but believes that what he says will happen, it will be done for him. Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask for in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours."

This is His promise. Did you hear me? This is God's promises to us. How can I doubt, how can I not have faith? If God can move mountains, how can I not trust that he can move a couple of papers from one person's hands to another?

Today I found this verse. I think it is appropriate that I end with it.

Romans 15:13 May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him , so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.

Please join me in prayer this week for adoptions all over the world.

No timeline

2008-04-05T20:49:00.000-07:00

It is so wonderful now that we can now put a name and a face to the little boy that we hope to adopt, but I have to say it makes waiting so much harder. Before we knew, we were just waiting to adopt what ever little boy we were referred once we got over there. I didn't know the name, the age, the story, or the face of our little boy to be, and the unknown seemed to make it easier to tolerate the wait. But now the waiting is driving me crazy. Actually, it is not knowing when we are going to travel that is driving me crazy.

If I was told that we would not travel until July, I could live with that because though it is a long way out, I would at least have that day to look forward to and plan for. The days of having a baby through pregnancy were so much easier in many ways because you always have a due date to look forward to and you know that your child will come around that time give or take a couple of weeks. But with adoption, there is no specific timeline. There never is. You can try and plan but the truth is that your child will come when you least expect it and you just have to be ready. Well, I am so ready! And I bet all of you parents waiting to adopt are ready too!

A doctor to help

2008-04-03T17:56:00.000-07:00

Again, I am in awe at how helpful you all have been. I know you are concerned about Dennis and the medical care available to him once he is here. Don't worry, I think he will be in good hands once he is home. I have been in contact with a pediatric plastic surgeon here in our area and he has been very helpful so far. He is willing to squeeze Dennis into his busy schedule as soon as he gets back from doing mission work in North Korea. How awesome is that? The fact that I have found a doctor that emailed me back the very same day to answer my millions of questions and he does mission work is just awesome in my book. Plus, he is extremely optimistic yet realistic about what Dennis will need to have done.

He knows that regardless of whether or not Dennis could be helped, we will love him no matter what, but this doctor is pretty certain that he can improve Dennis' quality of life.....which is all that John and I want for him. The doctor is concerned that the damaged eye is still connected to Dennis' brain and wants to remove it first thing. Later he will replace it with a glass eye. We are assuming that Dennis' left eye is perfectly fine. Secondly, he wants to see if there is cranial damage or if the damage is mainly superficial. He knows that there is some damage done to Dennis' mouth because his teeth are growing upward but that doesn't necessarily mean that the rest of his skull was punctured. Some of you have asked what to pray for specifically, and I would love for you guys to pray that his facial bone has not been damaged.

Naturally, his surgeries will be less invasive if there is no cranial damage, and so of course I hope that his scarring is only skin deep. I know that the less damage there is, the less pain he will have to go through with surgeries to correct it. We are very happy that we found out about Dennis while he is still so young. Not only can he get the love and attention that every child deserves all the sooner, but he can have corrected, the further damage done just through growing. There is evidence that his nose is beginning to pull to one side, but since he is still so young it is safe to assume that this can be fully corrected and his face will not become deformed.

Besides just wanting to wrap my arms around him and love him as my son, I am so happy to think that with us adopting him he will now have the opportunity to get the medical attention he needs to improve his life.... The way he sees, the way he feels, the way he eats, the way people look at him, and just the way that he lives his life. He will finally have the chance to live the life that all of my other children live. Nothing more, nothing less.

What is Dennis like?

2008-03-30T22:11:00.000-07:00

As promised, here is more about Dennis. Meredith, another adoptive mom, was at Dennis' same orphanage adopting her two children just last month and so I have had the privilege of hearing all about Dennis.

Here is what Meredith had to say.

"As some of you know, I had the privilege of meeting other children with special needs while I was in Ukraine. A few of these children were in Emma's and Micah's area and some were in other parts of the orphanage. One little boy that Mike and I always were glad to see up and around was little Denis. He is a very sweet little boy that is 18 months old and is learning to walk. He would go down the halls of the little infirmary area with just the fingers of a nurse as he learned to walk. He would cry his soft longing cry as Emma was changed into clothes to come visit with us (they were roommates). He is a typical kid, a sweet little boy. A baby, really."

When I read this, I welled up with tears at the thought of this perfectly healthy little boy sitting in a hospital just because he has some scarring on his face. He is not sick. He is not delayed. He is not contagious. He has so much potential....I'm sure almost all of these children have lots of potential. Why can't he be with the other normal children?

Meredith shares more.

"I will give you lots of details about the caretakers/orphanage/city in the next few days, but I wanted to tell you now that yes, the caretakers took good care of him and did not seem to stray away because of his face. They did, on the other hand, tend to keep him away from us. They were afraid he would be scary. I saw him on several occasions during my month there but usually in passing. They were holding his hands walking him down the short hallway once. Other times he was sitting up on a changing table and they were feeding him. And then the time I saw him when I went to take his photo. He stood up in his crib when we all came in and was interested in what was happening.

He cries... oh my he cries... Poor little guy. He would sit back there looking for someone to pay him attention and while we were waiting for our kids to be 'ready' for us we'd listen to his soft almost moaning. We wondered, a few times, if it was Emma, but they'd bring her to us and it continued.

He's really a CUTE kid. Take that picture and cover up the eye that's been damaged. Look at that sweet face! I think he will do well with the love and attention of a family. He's surpassed all odds in just being alive and the fact that he's trying to live when he spends all his days in a crib is amazing. Other children at the same orphanage just a few months older that have been out playing and crawling, etc. are just learning to walk (I've seen two in the playroom that were being adopted at 20 and 22 months and still unsteady)."

You don't have to sell him to me! We'll take him!

She continues,

"I don't know if he crawls but he can pull to standing in the crib and he walked with very little assistance about once a day through the hallway in the infirmary area :) His cry is longing. Not really loud, but just looking for someone to come. Sometimes almost a moan, if that makes sense. What's interesting is that NONE of the other kids in that area really cried (other than my Micah I'm guessing since he sure cries up a storm for me, but he always was being 'prepped' (put in clean clothes and a disposable diaper) when I was there so he always had someones attention).

Denis seems to still have a hope that his cries will be answered and I do think that the orphanage staff (they are nurses in that area) answer his cries. It's a very low staff to child ratio and I think, for lack of a better way to put it, that they feel sorry for him because there is nothing "wrong" with him- as they see with the other kids. He just has an injury. The other two kids in his room are completely non-responsive (and Emma-Daria was in there too). He really is a sweetheart! I can't wait to see him flourish in your family!!"

Neither can I. Thank you Meredith, for sharing about Dennis. It fills my heart with hope.

Spaciba

2008-03-30T17:33:00.001-07:00

Wow! All I can is wow! You guys are all so terrific. Thank you for all of your encouraging comments on my last post. Thank you for all of the personal emails. Even though there are no guarantees until we actually travel to Ukraine and receive Dennis's referral, I feel that with all of your prayers, it is certain. How can it not be?

Our donations are up to $620 now. Isn't that just amazing? I think that covers the cost of his plane ticket home. People we don't even know have stepped forward to help out financially, and I can't even begin to express how thankful John and I are. You guys have such big hearts and I want to say thanks for investing in Dennis's future. As I am sure you already know, you are investing in a little boy that is so deserving....... if he only knew how many people were working towards getting him home. I am sure he would say Spaciba if he could talk. :)

I look forward to sharing more about our journey.

Later when I have time, I will share some wonderful things about Dennis. Another family who traveled to his orphanage earlier this month to adopt two children has shared some very special things about him. What a blessing to be able to learn all about little Dennis through this other family.

A humble thank you

2008-03-29T11:13:00.000-07:00

I am humbled beyond words right now. I don't know who, and I don't quite know when, but we have received $410 in donations so that we can adopt and bring home Dennis. I am in complete shock. I really didn't think anyone would help us.

It was very hard for me to even put up the donation links. I really feared being judged for having the audacity to even suggest that we are open to donations. We had opened ourselves up to comments the very first time we adopted our two girls from Russia back in 2005 by asking for donations. Even though the cost of adopting a child is tens of thousands of dollars, a few people made me feel that because we were choosing to adopt another child with our already large family, we were somehow wrong to ask for any kind of financial help because it was obvious that by us asking for donations it meant that we couldn't afford to raise another child once they were home.

Like the answer is to not adopt a child just because we can use a little help coming up with all of the upfront adoption related costs of just getting our child home. I just couldn't make sense of the hurtful thoughts and comments that people had about us and it seemed easier to just not put up the donation link. I struggled with my pride and felt the easier way out would have been to just scrimp and save, take all of our money out of savings....basically do whatever it takes to bring him home. With the falling dollar, we are still probably going to have to do that, but it is so worth it when I think about our little guy languishing in his orphanage because no one can see past his scarring. At this point we have committed to bringing our little guy home and we know that through God we will raise all of the necessary funds to adopt Dennis.

But then I was reminded of something. I was reminded that by taking this route, I was not trusting God to provide anything for this adoption. I was also assuming that everyone who knew us felt this way. I was also reminded that I was taking away the blessing from another person who may want to help out financially so that we could bring our precious son home. I was essentially being my own God, trusting only myself to provide for Dennis to come home.

Well when I checked out our donation page and saw that $410 had already been donated, I knew that the person who reminded me was right and I was terribly wrong.

I am so very thankful that someone has felt led to donate money to help out with the adoption related costs. I think we already have enough to cover Dennis's visa. That is one less expense. I wish I knew your names so that I could personally thank each and everyone of you.

Someone mentioned to us that they would like to donate something but felt more comfortable giving directly to us. Thank you so much. I may put up a fundraising tracker that includes all donations not just those given through the adoption ministry we are using. I just wanted to share with you a verse that brings me great comfort for I trust His word.

I will not leave you as orphans, I will come to you. John 14:18

Lastly, please please please keep us in your prayers. Prayer for our paperwork to be submitted without any snags, prayer for a travel date, prayer for Dennis to make it through these next few weeks or months without us, prayer for childcare for our other children while we travel to get Dennis, prayer that our SDA appt. goes well, prayer for safe travels, prayer that our trip is quick and that our 10 days our waived. I know people doubt that the last one is possible, but with God all things are possible.

Introducing Dennis

2008-03-26T16:55:00.000-07:00

Dennis is already in my heart. John's too. God can work amazingly fast like that. I can't explain how.... I can only share how I feel.

Let me tell you a bit about him. Dennis is an incredible little boy. He is about this tall, with light blue eyes and sandy brown hair. He has amazing strength and a desire to live the life that God gave him to the fullest. I'm sure he has a tender heart, and I'm pretty sure that his smile lights up a room. He is learning to walk and probably talk, and despite the scarring that he has, he is one beautiful little boy.

He shares the same birthday as our daughter Anna. That means two birthday cakes, one vanilla and one chocolate, unless he prefers a banana cake. Because Dennis is so young, we will be able to say that we celebrated all but one birthday with him. That in itself, is so exciting to me.

Dennis most likely has sweet smelling breath, just like any baby and will probably love taking baths with his brother Jonny. Once home, Dennis will have to get used to being cuddled, and rocked, and held, and kissed. I hope he can't wait!

He will have a tough time deciding whether he is an Elmo or Wiggles fan, whether he prefers to climb the stairs or slide down, and whether he prefers raspberry kisses on his tummy or nibbles on his ear.

This little boy that will soon be joining our family is a perfectly healthy baby that is perfect in God's eyes.

If you would like to donate towards his adoption please email me privately for the link. Beyond money, please keep us in your prayers, specifically that we get a travel date to go and bring him home!

We know his name

2008-03-25T20:24:00.000-07:00

I have some exciting news! We have found the little boy that we would like to adopt. God willing, we will be traveling to Ukraine to adopt a little boy named Dennis.

I would like to share how we we came to this decision.

Even though I hadn't yet mentioned this on our blog publicly, John and I went into this adoption open to a child with special needs. We wanted to specifically help a child that most people would not set out to adopt. Whether that be a child with a cleft palette, or a missing hand, or another child with FAS.... that would be left up to God to choose the right son for us. All we know is that we have total trust that God will lay on our hearts, our son to be.... and he did.

Yesterday, God laid that precious little boy on our hearts and we committed to adopting him this morning.

It all started with another family who met a wonderful little boy. As this adoptive mom shared more and more I felt that Dennis was the one. Once I saw his picture and it called out to me, I knew that I had to talk to John. When I called him, he was very open to finding out more about this little boy. Later when he got home, I showed John his picture and we both decided to commit to adopt him. It was nothing short of amazing how we both felt peace about adopting Dennis without even really having to discuss it.

As we went to bed last night we prayed (I am finding out that many prayed last night for little Dennis) about our decision to adopt Dennis and asked God to work out all the details of his adoption.

Well so far, so good. This little eighteen month old boy is well on his way to joining our family and we couldn't be more thrilled.

I am very encouraged how everything is playing out at this point and I ask for your continued prayers in this adoption of a very sweet little boy that I already like to think of as my son.

I will share more about him soon. Hop on, the train is moving. Whoo! Whoo!

I wish

2008-03-19T23:01:00.000-07:00

You don't know how tempted I was to write something for the title like, "We got our appointment!" I bet it would have caused some excitement. Instead I have nothing to report.... still...... and so I will keep it short and sweet until I do have something more exciting to share with all of you.

Still, no news.

A miracle

2008-03-13T20:28:00.000-07:00

I can't believe all the different things that I have heard about Ukraine right now. No two families seem to be having the same experience. Many families have been having successful SDA appointments while others are coming home empty handed because they weren't shown healthy children. Even amongst all of this uncertainty, I know that God has our child picked out for us. I just know it. And though I can't stand all of this uncertainty, it is kind of exciting because whatever happens next to get our adoption moving will be nothing short of a miracle. And who doesn't want to witness a miracle?

A small update

2008-03-10T19:44:00.000-07:00

We're still here and dossier has been translated.

Anxious

2008-03-06T12:56:00.001-08:00

Waiting. Waiting. Waiting is so very hard. It takes a great deal of patience. I'm a get er' done kind of girl, so when something is put in the hands of another person, it is hard to not expect them to just get er' done too!

Of course, I am talking about our dossier. Don't get me wrong, I know it is in good hands, but just like any family waiting to adopt, I want to know every detail and why things can't be done ten times faster than the rate they are getting done.

And then before I know it, he will be here, and our adoption will be a thing of the past. And there will be no more waiting because he will be here.

A child's angel

2008-03-01T13:58:00.000-08:00

My mom sent me this poem. Since we are waiting for our "newborn" it touched me to think that I will be able to help our new child with all of these things.

A newborn's conversation with God

A baby asked God, "They tell me you are sending me to earth tomorrow, but how am I going to live there being so small and helpless?"

God said, "Your angel will be waiting for you and will take care of you."

The child further inquired, "But tell me, here in heaven I don't have to do anything but sing and smile to behappy."

God said, "Your angel will sing for you and will also smile for you. And you will feel your angel's love and be very happy."

Again the child asked, "And how am I going to be able to understand when people talk to me if I don't know the language?"

God said, "Your angel will tell you the most beautiful and sweetest words you will ever hear, and with much patience and care, your angel will teach you how to speak."

"And what am I going to do when I want to talk to you?"

God said, "Your angel will place your hands together and will teach you how to pray."

''Who will protect me?"

God said, "Your angel will defend you even if it means risking its life."

"But I will always be sad because I will not see you anymore."

God said, "Your angel will always talk to you about Me and will teach you the way to come back to Me, even though I will always be next to you."

At that moment there was much peace in Heaven, but voices from Earth could be heard and the child hurriedly asked, "God, if I am to leave now, please tell me my angel's name."

God said, "You will simply call her, Mom."

Arrived safely

2008-02-25T14:44:00.000-08:00

Our dossier made it safely to Ukraine! Let the translation begin!

On another note, thank you for all of your comments about court attire. I can put the clothes thing behind me now.

Now are any of you willing to share where you found the best deals on plane tickets? Which airline did you fly? Did you use a travel agent or did you buy tickets off the internet? Are there any direct flights from any big cities in California? Is it better to buy one way tickets or change the dates on a regular ticket? We are happy flying coach, and if there is a Ukraine airline, we are fine flying with them too. I just want a good deal ----- translation, I am cheap.

Lastly, I am excited to report that I have firmed up childcare for two weeks for five of the kids. Someone had asked me what we were going to do with all the kids when we travel. It is hard to leave them, but I know they will be in good hands. Thanks to this blog, they will be able to get regular updates.

How much clothes to pack

2008-02-24T11:06:00.000-08:00

I've been told to pack light. As light as possible. On our last adoption trip, we packed way to much and had way to many suitcases to pull and carry. I don't want to repeat that nightmare.
So, I am going to take my agency's advice.

Yesterday, I took my oldest son Adam shopping for new pants. I also found a nice outfit for court. I plan to wear dark brown pin-striped slacks with a brown cable sweater with a white collar shirt underneath. I also bought some nice brown boots on clearance to match. Does this sound dressy enough? Please, please share your opinion. I am counting on you guys. ;)

My plan is to wear this same outfit to our SDA appointment and our first visit to the orphanage. One outfit for three different occasions seems like a good idea. Did anybody else do this? What did your husband wear to court? Last time, my husband wore a suit, but would slacks and a nice shirt suffice?

How many everyday outfits should I pack for each of us? Since we are planning on doing two trips, I hope we will be over there only two weeks this first time. Would three outfits in addition to my court outfit be enough? How about just two pairs of shoes?

Ahhhh, let the planning begin.

BTW, our dossier package left from the UK early this morning. :)

Dossier is on it's way!

2008-02-21T14:08:00.000-08:00

I watched our agency coordinator seal the envelope that has our completed dossier. It is officially on its way to Kiev. I can't believe how good it feels to finally be done with this stage. Now I can take a deep breath and relax for a bit.