God showed me

Admittedly, the past couple of days have been really challenging for me. Ever since I bought our tickets on Friday I have felt uneasy about it. All weekend my mind raced with thoughts about this adoption. We celebrated one of our daughters birthday on Saturday, and I felt bad because my mind wasn't completely focused on her.

First off, our tickets cost more than we were originally quoted thanks to Aeroflot adding on a commission. Secondly, our tickets had a layover in Moscow, Russia which has two airports with the same name--- SVO1 and SVO2. I could not get in writing that we did not have to change airports and when I found out that there was a new terminal C, I about lost all confidence that I had booked us good flights. I was nervous. My nervousness fed my other concerns and soon I was worrying about all kinds of things again. God, will we have all the money by the time that we leave? I haven't even began packing yet. I haven't bought any gifts yet. I haven't made a picture book of our family. Blah, blah, blah, blah. At this point I knew I should dive into the word. I knew it. My heart knew it. My mind knew it. But I didn't make time for God, and I suffered all weekend.

To make a long story short, by this morning, my birthday, I was starting to feel sick to my stomach. And selfishly, I headed over to my computer to read my email instead of opening the bible and spending time with God. If I were God, I probably would have made the Internet not work this morning, but instead I opened my email to find a note from Reece's Rainbow saying that someone or many persons had donated over $500.00 overnight. Tears started flowing down my cheeks. God is so faithful folks. I am here to tell you that. Even when we are so unworthy, God is ready to pour on His grace. Thank you God.

After seeing that email, I finally got off the computer and went up to my room to get my bible. I opened it up and found an old post-it note with the verse Psalms 143:7 I was flabbergasted.

Psalm 143:7 (NIV) Answer me quickly, O LORD; my spirit fails. Do not hide your face from me or I will be like those who go down to the pit.

I couldn't believe it. And I couldn't believe it when the phone rang about ten minutes later as I was finishing up praying and it was my travel agent saying that she got my message about canceling our flight and finding a better one. She said that she found great seats on Delta with one layover at JFK. The times were perfect, and so was the price. Praise God. I thought to myself, "How'd you do that?"

And literally minutes later, John called me to say that we are one step closer to having our tax return back in time to use it for the adoption. Woo-hooooo! It was just so evident that God was telling me yet again,

"Christine, calm down. Take a deep breath. Relax. I am here. I am here for you. Aren't I always? When do I fail you? I love you. Please remember to come to me with your troubles. Do not worry about your adoption. You are doing what I called you to do. I will provide for your needs. Don't I always? I love you, Christine. Do not worry. "

By the end of the day, God showed himself to me time and time again. Things that were troubling me but had kind of taken a back seat have been resolved. Thank you God. God is clearing the path for me to focus on more important things, like getting our son, by freeing up my time to focus on Him more. Make sense?

To top off the day, I have to share that a very special letter came in the mail today. Nothing else---just this letter..... and a check. The letter was from one of my sisters in Christ that want to remain anonymous. I completely respect that. You know who you are and I thank you so much for the love offering to bring Dennis home. Your letter couldn't have come on a more poignant day.